Family Reigns Results
December 29, 2008
From Parts Unknown Arena in Parts Unknown, USA
![[image]](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v623/DavidBlade/familyreignsposter.png)
(The Family Reigns PPV theme song “Helter Skelter” by The Beatles plays. A video package of all the feuds going on starts to play and Family Reigns opens up at the announce booth with D-Day Dave and Madman Szalinski.)
D-Day Dave- Welcome to FAMILY REIGNS!!!!! We have a huge pay per view for you tonight.
Madman Szalinski- That is right Dave and it is going to be awesome! Iron Maiden, Pole on a Pole, Sponge Bath, how could it get any better.
Dave- Well lets run down the card here. First match of the night we have the huge Ten Man Gauntlet to decide the Inter-Forum Championship No. 1 Contender.
Madman- Then after that we have a Sponge Bath Match between M.O.P. and Whitey “Daddy Phat Sax” Fats. I’d rather see some chicks in this one but hey two guys beating the hell out of each other is almost just as good.
Dave- Then we have the Pole On A Pole Match between Stryker Dark Silence and Square. Both men have been having a lot of problems lately with Square trying to get Stryker to join him and Starshine in their new Non-American Heroes group. It should be interesting to see what happens in that one.
Madman- Then we have the big Hardcore Championship Chairs, Chairs, and Chairs Match between the Hardcore Champion The General of the Monkey Army, and the mysterious “Evil La Parka”. I don’t know about you but I’d have to say that “Evil La Parka” has quite a big advantage here in this match being the steel chairman of the WWCF and all.
Dave- That is true but you can’t count out The General’s pure toughness and militant strategy planning which got him the Hardcore Title in the first place. After that we have the Double Dog Collar Match between Motor-Colt and littlenaitch facing J is Justice and Metylerca. Motor-Colt and littlenaitch have shown a great amount of mutual respect to each other these past few weeks so we will see if that is good enough to get the job done here tonight.
Madman- Then we have the brutal Iron Maiden Match between Evil Masked wordlifeecw and Cthulhu aka Providence. Iron Maiden songs will be playing while this brutal and bloody match takes place and I can’t smurfing wait!!!
Dave- Then we have the main event of the evening. Both the World Championship and the Inter-Forum Championship are on the line. It will be the WWCF World Champ MiLo Duck and the Inter-Forum Champ Above Average taking on Sam08 Family members Tyfo and TromboneMan. Bringing in the factor that The Sam himself is going to be the referee for this one I don’t like the chances of MiLo Duck and Above Average.
Madman- Yeah if I was a betting man…..which I am by the way…..I’d put all my money on The Sam08 Family in this one.
Dave- Well lets go down to the ring to our newest ring announcer Michael Muffer for the bit opening Ten Man Gauntlet Match.
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Gauntlet for the Gold: Winner of Gauntlet Match becomes No. 1 Contender for Inter-Forum Championship
Disco Stu VS grbjazzman VS The Iron Giant VS Koda89 VS Legion VS MolotovMocktail VS One Doley NationVS Starshine VS Supersmark VS special guest Barry Horrowitz
Michael Muffer – The following contest if the “Gauntlet for the Gold” Match. And here are the rules. There are 10 paricipants in this match; each participant has drawn a number 1 to 10. The competitors who drew Numbers 1 and 2 will start the match. They can win by Pinfall, Submission, Count out or DQ. As soon as they have defeated their opponent the individual who drew number 3 will enter the match. This will continue until all 10 competitors have entered the match and the last person standing will be declared the winner and #1 contender for the Inter-Forum championship at the next PPV.
Introducing the competitor who drew number 1…
Dave - …well, who is it?
Szalinski – I don’t know, but I’d sure hate to be them right now
(I Hope You Die by The Bloodhound Gang plays over the P.A.)
Michael Muffer - Making his way to the ring, from Petaluma, California. Weighing in at 160 pounds. MOLOTOV MOCKTAIL!
(Mocktail walks through the curtain with his hands on his hips shaking his head in disapproval. He marches down to the ring looking angry)
Michael Muffer – And his opponent…
(Dirty Deeds by AC/DC plays over the P.A.)
Michael Muffer - From Ann Arbor, Michigan. Weighing in at 220 pounds. SUPER SMARK!
(Super Smark runs through the curtain with laptop in hand, he rolls into the ring and taunts for the crowd)
(Super Smark holds out his hand to shake Mocktails hand. Mocktail just looks at Smarks hand, shakes his head, grabs a microphone and cuts a promo)
Mocktail – I just wanted to say, I think this is Bull crap. I am a legend. I am a veteran. I should be treated with respect. I deserve the number 10 spot. But instead I have to start at number 1 with this….GEEK…..this….NERD…..this…..POINDEXTER.
But I’ll tell you what, I’m going to do the impossible and beat all 9 other competitors. Because I have more experience than all of them combined.
(As the fans boo, Mocktail runs to the ropes and starts yelling at the fans to shut up, as he is doing so Supersmark gets a schoolboy pin rollup)
1
2
3
Announcer – Molotov Mocktail has been eliminated.
(Mocktail is fuming, he try’s to attack Supersmark but the referee and security hold him back and force him back into the locker room)
Announcer – Introducing the participant who drew number 3…
(Brian Kendrick’s theme plays)
Announcer – Making his way to the ring, from Belfast, Northern Ireland weighing in at 280 pounds. ONE! DOLEY! NATION!
(One Doley Nation slides into the ring and the bell rings)
They go for a lock up, Doley pushes Smark into the corner and releases the old. They go into the lock up again, and once again Doley pushes Smark into the corner, this time however Doley slaps Smark. They lock up for a third time, Doley pushes Smark into the corner and Doley attempts to punch Smark, but Smark dodges the punch and hits a Belly to Belly suplex. Doley slides out of the ring getting a count of 5 before entering the ring again. As he is entering Smark attempts to grab him but Doley gives Smark an eye rake. Doley bunces off the opposite rope and hits a big boot. Doley goes for the pin.
1
2
only a 2 count.
Doley picks up Smark and hits a suplex. He attempts a lion Sault but Smark rolls out of the way, Doley lands on his feet and runs towards Smark. As he does so, Smark hits a Franken Steiner on Doley and locks him into a pinfall.
1
2
2 count.
Smark then taunts the crowd that he is going for his finisher, as Doley stands up Smark hits “The Download” followed by lifting Doley over his shoulders for “The Crash”. He loses his balance and Doleys legs hits the ref, the ref is down and Doley lands on his feet. Smark hits a Western Lariat. Smark tends to the referee, as he does so, Doley grabs Smarks laptop and waffles him with it before hitting a “Dolinator”.
He goes for the pinfall.
The referee gets his composure.
1
2
3
Announcer – Introducing the participant who drew number 4.
(Da Funk by Daft Punk plays)
Making his way to the ring, from St Petersburg, Florida. Weighing in at 221 pounds. BARRY HORROWITZ!
(Barry Horrowitz comes thought he curtain clapping and smiling, he high fives all the fans as he walks to the ring. He climbs into the ring, climbs the turnbuckle and pats himself on the back, the bell rings)
Doley attacks Horrowitz as he is on the turnbuckle. Doley throws punch after punch before Horrowitz hits a Jawbreaker. As Doley is dazed and confused Horrowitz hits a Northern Lights Suplex.
1
2
3
Announcer – Doley has been eliminated.
(Horrowitz pats himself on the back as Doley is helped back to the locker room)
Announcer – Introducing the individual who drew number 5.
(Saturday Night Fever starts playing)
Announcer – From Downtown Chicago, weighing in at 200 pounds. DISCO STU!
(Disco Stu struts and dances his way to the ring as Horrowitz looks on in confusion and the fans boo Stu)
Szalinski – Disco Stu may be living in the 70’s, but even back then Horrowitz was old school.
Dave – Will you stop?
The bell rings as Stu dances around the ring and mocks Barry. As Stu turns around to face Barry, Barry hits an uppercut sending Stu to the mat. Stu reels back holding his jaw and pleading with Barry to not hurt him. As Barry approaches Stu, Stu kicks Barry in the mid section and hits a Disco Upper Cut of his own. Stu goes for the pin.
1
2
barely a 2 count.
Stu gets up and continues dancing. As Barry gets to his feet Stu hits a Super 70’s Super Kick. Once again Stu goes for the pinfall.
1
2
2 count.
Stu gets up and starts dancing off the ropes. As Barry gets up Stu hits Barry with a Boogie Woogie But Bomb. Stu once again goes for a 3 count.
1
2
Once again a 2 count.
Stu is angry and starts arguing with the ref. As he is doing so Barry reaches between Stu’s legs, goes for a roll up and locks in a Texas Cloverleaf.
Stu is reaching for the ropes, writhing in pain. Stu taps out.
Barry lets go of the hold and pats himself on the back. As Stu is helped to the back.
Announcer - Introducing the participant who drew number 6.
(The lights go out an a maniacal laugh can be heard over the P.A.
the lights come back on and standing in the ring is Koda89.
The bell rings and Koda hits “The Killing Joke”.
Dave – Wait a minute? Is Koda the next entrant in this match?
Szalinski – I assume he is.
Koda does not go for a pinfall but rather stands above Barry and laughs maniacally into his face. The lights go out once again as Koda laughs. The lights come back on an Koda has disappeared.
The Referee tells the announcer this message;
The Announcer – I have just been informed that is Koda does not come back to the ring he will be counted out.
The Referee begins a 10 count as Barry is knocked unconscious in the middle of the ring.
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
Barry is still K.O.’d in the ring.
Announcer - introducing the participant who drew number 7
Starshine runs down to the ring , slides in, and demands the referee starts the match immediatly. Even before the announcer introduces him to the ring.
The ref rings the bell and Starshine goes for a pin.
1
2
3
Starshine starts celebrating in the ring as the fans boo on.
Announcer – Introducing the person who drew number 8.
(Sing, Sang, Sung by Gordon Goodwin plays)
Announcer – From Fulton, New York. Weighing in at 206 pounds. GRBJAZZMAN!
(grbjazzman struts down to the ring with confidence in his eyes, he enters the ring, removes his fedora and the ref rings the bell)
Starshine keeps dodging and blocking Jazzman for the first few minutes of the match. Starshine then “Blind Spots” Jazzman and begins kicking and punching Jazzman. Starshine then hits a Swinging Neck breaker. Starshine goes for the pin.
1
2
Kick out at 2.5
Starshine then lifts Jazzman to his feet and locks in an abdominal stretch. As Starshine locks the Stretch in tighter and tighter, Starshine grabs the top rope for leverage. The referee looks over and Starshine has let go of the rope. When the ref turns Jazzman again, Starshine once again grabs the ropes. The ref turns and see’s Starshine holding the rope, he begins a 5 count.
1
2
3
4
Jazzman reverses the Stretch with a hip toss. As Starshine gets to his feet Jazzman hits a reverse body slam. Followed by a Judo throw. Followed by a yakuza kick to the face. Jazzman goes for a pin.
1
2
Kick out.
Jazzman sends Starshine to the turnbuckle and hits a series of chops. Starshine dodges the 4th chop and gets a yakuza kick to the face. Starshine is flat on his back, so Jazzman ascends to the 2nd rope looking for an elbow drop. He shakes his head and climbs to the top. Suddenly Starshine kicks the referee sending him into the ropes, which causes Jazzman to get crotched on the top turnbuckle.
Starshine gets up as the referee yells at him, Starshine goes up top, grabs Jazzman’s and gives a superplex from the top rope. Both man are laid out on the canvas. The referee starts a 10 count.
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
Starshine gets to his feet first followed by Jazzman. They start throwing punches and chops. Starshine dodges a chop and attempts to hit a “Star Shot”. Jazzman wiggles his way out of the hold and hits the “Takin’ the A Train”. Jazzman goes for the pin.
1
2
3
Announcer – Introducing the participant who drew number 9.
(Legions theme starts playing, Legion walks through the curtain. As he makes his way to the ring Starshine attacks Jazzman from behind and locks him in a Sharpshooter for a good 3 minutes before the officials can force Starshine out of the ring.
Legion finally gets in the ring and the referee rings the bell as Jazzman is out cold. Legion locks in the Arms of Morpheus. Jazzman is out cold, the referee begins a 3 count.
Ref raises Jazzman’s hand once.
Drops the hand.
1
The referee raises Jazzman’s hand again.
Drops the hand.
2
The referee raises the unconscious hand of Jazzman one final time.
As he drops it Jazzman’s arm stiffens and Jazzman starts hitting elbows on Legion, forcing Legion to release the hold.
As Jazzman is getting to his feet Legion prepares to hit the “Fall from Grace”. As he does Jazzman manages to spin Legion around and hit a small package for the pinfall.
1
2
3
(Legion is shocked, the referee is shocked, the announcer is shocked, Jazzman is out cold)
Announcer – And now the final participant in this match.
(Profokiev's Romeo and Juliet hits the speakers)
Announcer – Making his way to the ring, from Mount Olympus. Standing at 7 foot 2, weighing in at 320 pounds. THE IRON GIANT!
(The Iron Giant marches his down to the ring before stepping over the top rope. As Jazzman is getting to his feet the referee rings the bell and Iron Giant hits a knee to the mid section before delivering a head butt which causes Jazzman to be busted wide open.
Iron Giant goes for a pin.
1
2
Iron Giant lifts Jazzman’s hand up off the canvas.
Iron Giant lifts Jazzman and sends him to the ropes and Iron Giant hits a Lariat on Jazzman. Iron Giant lifts Jazzman up off the canvas again before hitting an Over arm Judo Trip.
Iron Giant drags Jazzman to the corner turnbuckle and delivers an Overhand chop. Iron Giant looks down on a helpless, bloody, unconscious Jazzman before ascending to the top rope. Iron Giant then hits a Moonsault on Jazzman sending the crowd into chants of “HOLY S***!” and “THAT WAS AWESOME!”
Iron Giant stands up and calls for the Delphic Deliverance. As he lifts up Jazzman, Jazzman slips out of his hands and with Jazzman’s last ounce of strength grabs Iron Giant and rolls him into a schoolboy pin.
1
2
3
the winner of this match, GRBJAZZMAN!!!
The crowd erupts as Bruised and Battered Jazzman makes his way through the crowd. Iron Giant is furious. Iron Giant goes to the outside of the ring and rips the steel steps in half before being retreated to the locker room.
Backstage we see The Sam in the Family locker room sitting in his wheelchair wearing his referee shirt watching the TV monitor. G.Neric walks in.
The Sam – WHAT DID I SAY NERIC? WHAT DID I SAY? Did I say that Gauntlet for the Gold would be exciting or what.
Neric – Indeed it was The Sam.
The Sam – And now we got ourselves a number 1 contender for the Inter-Forum championship.
Neric – Speaking of which, tonight, you will be officiating a match between 2 members of The Family, and their opponents being the World Champion and Forum champion. Don’t you think that’s a little bias?
The Sam – Why does everyone think I’m going to cheat? Like I have been saying over the past few weeks, the only reason I don’t let a commissioned referee take control of this match is because they couldn’t. They could not take control of a match of that magnitude. But I can, I survived a tombstone piled river on concrete, and manage to still breath, if that doesn’t qualify me for tough I don’t know what does. And I know how to control people. And that’s why I’m the leader of The Family. Now if you don’t mind, I have a match to get ready for.
(The Sam wheels himself out of the room)
G.Neric – Back to you at ringside.
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M.O.P. Promo- *still selling the vicious chair attack from last week's Niteraw* Well, you certainly did a number on me last week, Whitey. Taking advantage of a weakened person like that. Way to prove you're the better man, there.
And you know what, the pain's still ringing in my head. *holds up a doctor's note* My doctor thinks I shouldn't even be allowed to kick your punk ass tonight in our match, but you know what? F*** him, and f*** you! *rips up note*
Tonight, the gloves come off, Whitey. Mr. Nice M.O.P. isn't here anymore. Because I still have my ability. My honor. My pride! And tonight, Whitey, I'm going to show you no mercy when I send your ass on a ride up the Turnpike! And it's not going to feel like a pleasant summer day at the Jersey Shore when I throw your ass into that bathwater!
Sponge Bath Match
M.O.P. VOTES
VS
Whitey "Daddy Phat Sax" Fats
Michael Muffer- Ladies and Gentlemen, it is now time for the first ever bath match. The first man to be bathed will be the loser.'
The bells rings as Simply The Best plays over the sounds system as Whitey Fats makes his way to the ring. He starts to pose as Burning Soul! plays over the loudspeaker, signaling the arrival of his opponent M.O.P. The two meet in the center of the ring as the bell rings in the distance.
The two men tie up and Whitey uses his strength to force MOP into a corner. MOP ducks under a punch and starts chopping the hell out of Fats. Fats comes back out to the center of the ring and hits a big scoop slam and an elbow drop to keep MOP down as Fats poses to the crowd. Whitey picks MOP up slowly and throws him out to the floor.
Fats follows MOP out there and sets him up for a big power bomb. He gets MOP up but he battles back with punches and he gets out of the power bomb with a sunset flip type maneuver from atop Fats' shoulders. MOP then gets up on the apron and hits a running Senton off the apron to a prone Fats. MOP then locks in the armbar to continue to wear down Fats. The two men struggle to their feet and Fats irish whips MOP toward the bathing area.
Fats and MOP battle back to the tub and MOP hits a big swinging neckbreaker on the linoleum floor with a sickening splat sound. He drags Fats to his feet and gets ready to throw him in the tub, when Whitey gets a go behind and hits a Dragon suplex and both men are down just feet away from the tub!! Fats recovers first and lays the boots to MOP. He picks up MOP and goes for the Burning Hammer right into the tub but MOP wiggles out of it and gets down to his feet and punches Fats with some big right hands right in front of the tub making Whitey rock back just above the tub. MOP picks up Fats for the Turnpike Driver and hits it perfectly right into the TUB!!!!!!!!!!!!
Michael Muffer- Here is your winner…………….M.O.P.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After the match M.O.P. raises his hands in victory but he gets hit from behind with a chair by a soaking wet Whitey Fats. Fats grabs M.O.P. and hits a vicious Burning Hammer on the chair. Security escorts Whitey Fats away as medics come to M.O.P. to help him on a stretcher. M.O.P. pushes them away and gets back to his feet all wobbly on his own. He grabs a mic.
M.O.P.- Fats you are going to have to do more than that to take me out. This New Jersey native has way too much Pride to be taken out in a cheap way like that!!!
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(Before the next match Fred G. Neric catches up with Stryker Dark Silence who is about to make his entrance.)
G. Neric- Hey Stryker do you have any last words before your big match with Square?
Stryker- The penny dropped, the puzzle fell into place, and tonight you will reap what you sow.
Pole On A Pole Match
Stryker Dark Silence
VS
Square
Michael Muffer- Ladies and Gentlemen it is now time for the Pole On A Pole Match!!!!!
Stryker Dark Silence enters first in his black and white kilt and leather jacket. He looks ready to go.
Next Square comes out with a huge smile on his face not taking his eyes off Stryker.
The two meet in the ring and Stryker with a smile still on his face puts out his hand for Stryker to shake. Stryker is unsure and hesitant. He looks to the crowd and they yell no but he isn’t sure. He puts his hand up and shakes Square’s very cautiously but nothing happens and the handshake goes very well. The two back up and prepare to wrestle.
Square walks up to Stryker and pushes him which makes a big Ohhhhh!!! from the crowd. Stryker retaliates with a slap knocking the smile that Square had been carrying with him right off his face. The two lock up and Square powers Stryker into the corner and goes for a right handed punch but Stryker ducks it and goes behind Square for a german suplex. He tries to pull off the german suplex but Square blocks it and reverses it getting behind Stryker for the same move.
Stryker grabs the ropes to block it and elbows Square right in the face. Stryker turns around and kicks Square right in the gut and goes for a DDT but Square blocks it and hits a Northern Lights Suplex on Stryker. Square gets up and starts putting boots to Stryker. He runs over to the corner and starts climbing the pole to grab the pole at the top. Stryker regroups and takes chase and pulls Square back down. Stryker delivers a big belly to belly suplex to Square.
Stryker starts climbing up the pole and gets to the top. He grabs the pole and then jumps down. Square is back up to his feet and Stryker takes a big swing with the pole but Square ducks it and pulls off a vicious drop kick on Stryker sending Stryker and the pole to the outside. Square waits for Stryker to get to his feet and Square takes off and hits a vicious drop kick suicide dive on Stryker. Square picks up the pole and cracks it over the back of Stryker. Square throws the pole back into the ring and picks up Stryker. Square irish whips Stryker right into the steel steps.
Square picks up Stryker again and throws him into the ring. Square taunts the crowd a little bit yelling “English is the greatest country in the world” as he goes to the top rope. Square goes for a huge frog splash but Stryker gets out of the way just in time. Both men are down now. The ref starts the ten count as they both slowly get to their feet. The two meet in the middle of the ring again bruised and battered. Square tries to kick Stryker in the gut but Stryker blocks it and grabs Square’s leg forcing Square to hop around. Square goes for the inziguri kick to the head but Stryker ducks it sending Square down to the apron hard. Stryker takes a look at the pole standing in the corner that the loose pole was on top of and looks down at the fallen Square. Stryker grabs Square’s legs and sets him up for a sling shot to go right into the pole. Stryker leans back to execute the move but just as Square goes off the mat he grabs the other pole and holds it up blocking any impact that he would have had with the pole in the corner. Square waits for Stryker to get up and delivers a clothesline with the pole on Stryker.
Square stalks Stryker waiting for him to get back to his feet and delivers a huge impactful SQUAREPLOSION(spinning roaring elbow). Square goes for the cover and get the pin.
Michael Muffer- And here is your winner……………SQUARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After the match Square helps Stryker get to his feet. The two look at each other and it looks like they are going to tear each other apart but they decide not to and start shaking hands. Square pulls in Stryker and they give each other a big hug out of respect for the incredible match they just had. Stryker holds up Square’s arm and points to him. After that Stryker goes to lean on the ropes to rest and Square wipes the emotional look off his face and grabs the pole. Stryker turns around and Square cracks the pole over Stryker’s head breaking it and knocking Stryker out. Starshine runs out and both men grabs half of a pole and start a vicious beating on Stryker. MiLo Duck comes running out with steel chair in hand and chases off The Non-American Heroes as they run out of the ring celebrating for what they did to Stryker.
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Hardcore Title Match
Chairs, Chairs, and Chairs Match
General of the Monkey Army (champion)
VS
"Evil La Parka"
Michael Muffer- And the next match has a 45 minute time limit, and is scheduled for one fall! He weighs in at 225lbs, stands 6 feet flat. Hailing from Lansing Michigan, he is The General of the Monkey Army!
*An animistic roar blares over the House Mic as a signal of the arrival of The General of the Monkey Army. he has a Riding crop in his hand, and his assistant, Bingo, has a pouch of powder ready for usage.
Michael Muffer- And his opponent: He also weighs 225lbs, also stands 6 feet flat, but hails from Mexico City, Mexico. He is Evil La Parka!
*Micheal Jackson' "thriller" starts up, as La Parka emerges from the entrance, Chair in hand, and does his entrance dance. As he starts to head to the Ring, The General does a uncharacteristic Plan ch onto him, as the Bell rings.
The General successfully hits La Parka with the Plancha, and proceeds with Steve Austin-like Punches, then Stomps onto him. He then stands up, and appeals to the crowd, who return in kind. This showboating costs him, as Parka fouls him, and hits him in the groin with the side of the Chair. He then proceeds to whip The General into the Railing multiple times, and kicks him out into the crowd. Parka then appeals, but gets boos instead. Angry, Parka then drags the General hair-first into the ring.
But La Parka is caught unaware by Bingo's throwing of Powder, blinding him, leaving him easy prey to the enraged General, who takes the Crop, and literally bends it over Parka's head, after repeated strikes to it. An Eye Poke from Parka slows down the pace of the match. Both men then struggle to their feet, and The General then proceeds to clotheline Parka out.
Once outside, The General grabs Parka by the mask, and drags him out into the crowds, brawling all the way. Parka bites his ear to make him let go, and both men grab Chairs and proceed to have a Chair Duel. Parka is beaten, and thrown all the way down the aisle into the Concession Stand. Popcorn, Soda, Hot Dogs are both used and destroyed by the two, before both leave, and enter the top of the Ramp.
Once up on the entrance ramp the General proceeds to beat La Parka all the way to the Ring. General then proceeds to run up to the top of the ramp, and brings out a bicycle, which he then rides down the Ramp, and Clotheslines la Parka on the way down. The general then tosses Parka, and Parka proceeds to beg for mercy, but the General ignores Parka’s pleas and back hands him right in the face knocking Parka down to the ground. The General sets La Parka up against the ropes and puts a chair in front of La Parka’s face. The General reaches back and hits a massive Monkey Paw denting the chair right into La Parka’s face. He goes for the cover and gets the pin.
Michael Muffer- Here is your winner and still WWCF Hardcore Champion…………….THE GENERAL OF THE MONKEY ARMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
________________________________________
*Before the next match, One Winged Angel remix plays as out comes Seth Drakin with a new look. He now has black hair and a black goatee with the middle part of the beard shaved. He is no longer in a sweater and slacks and has dropped the entire cheerful Uncle look. He has a cane with him as he enters the ring. Seth grabs two mics and makes sure the referee already in the ring doesn’t leave.*
Seth: I guess you should already know why I am here and why I am not letting you leave. You see, you were the man who was hired to referee in the main event at the In Your Apartment. Now, your job was not only to get a winner out of a match, but also to make sure to stop the match if one superstar is no longer able to compete. Unfortunately, you didnt do one of that and because of that, I was out for one month and a half. Do you what it is like to watch something that you work in and know that you can't compete due to injuries. It is boring and it is sad.
Ref: Look, Seth.....can we talk about this another time? My family is here.
*The camera looks at the people who are his wife and kids in the front row. Seth sees this and then corners him.*
Seth: Consequences for the actions of one person don't take a number and they certainly don't wait. And since your family is here, it just adds more to the reason as to why we need to talk now!!! I had to face my family when I had a neckbrace. Do you know how much it sucks to have Thanksgiving dinner with a neckbrace?
You don't? Well....it sucks. But you know, while I was injured, I was able to find my true self and I promised that someone would recieve what would be a taste of what is to come for others. And guess what.....I nominate you!!!!
*Seth raises his cane as the ref goes down on his knees.*
Ref: Look, Seth.....I didnt know you were injured and I made a mistake. I am truly sorry about what happened. But please.....don't do this.
*Seth lowers his cane*
Seth: Get up....you are embarressing yourself.
*The ref gets up.*
Ref: So you are forgiving me?
Seth: Well, since it is the holidays.....I will forgive you.
Ref: Thank you very mu....
*Seth then jabs his cane into the ref's stomach. The ref goes down in pain.*
Seth: After this!!!
*Seth takes the refs shirt off and handcuffs his hands to the top rope so that his back his facing Seth. Seth prepares to hit him, but lowers his cane again and begins to speak.*
Seth: Spare The Rod.....Spoil The Child!!!!
*Seth then his the ref in the back with the cane. The ref screams in pain as Seth goes up to him.*
Seth: It isnt over yet....that was number one and we have fourteen whacks to go.
*Seth hits him again.*
Seth: Two!!!
*Seth continues to hit him and yell out the number of hits for him. By number ten, referees and backstage personel come out and try to stop this. But Seth raises his cane, threatening to hit them. With that, they back off. Seth continues to hit the ref with the cane...all the while yelling out the number. After the fifteenth whack, the ref coughs up some blood. Seth grabs some of the blood from his chin and smears it on his chest while smiling. He then looks at the others waiting.*
Seth: You can not pick up the garbage....
*Seth gets out of the ring while the officials try to help him out.*
Seth: Oh....here is the key.
*Seth throws one of the officials the key as he goes up the ramp. Seth smiles as the fans boo his actions. The officials help the ref to the back while Seth officially leaves behind the curtain. A new referee is now in the ring to officiate the following match.*
________________________________________
(We go backstage to The Story locker room where the stable is talking)
Motor-Colt Promo Before His Match
Above: Colt, buddy, seriously... Are you sure you want to go through with this match alone? I mean LittleNaitch is The Family... the enemy. He says he respects you, but this could all be a set up.[/blue]
Wordlife: Yeah, I mean think about it, the other Family members are going straight for Above Average and his title, there is no alliance between The Family and The Story here tonight.
Colt: Seriously, guys... I appreciate the concern and I know the Family can't be trusted. But, atleast for tonight... me and LittleNaitch have a common goal, this isn't going to be a permanent thing.
Above: So you actually believe that this alliance with you and LittleNaitch isn't going to be a permanent thing?
Colt: Of course, I mean I'm not daft...
Wordlife: Then why do must you insist on going it alone?
Colt: Simple... My match is the first of ours on the card... I don't want getting involved and jepordising your chances in your matches... You guys have alot more on the line in your matches than I do...
Wordlife: Even if you get jumped?
Colt: I got this...
Double Dog Collar Match
Motor-Colt and littlenaitch
VS
Metylerca and J is Justice
A focused Motor Colt enters to a mixed reaction. Without playing to the crowd, he steps into the ring and stares at the entrance way. Next out is littlenaich, who slowly makes his way down, not taking his eyes of Colt. He cautiously enters the ring, standing on the ringside opposite his partner. Neither takes his eyes off each other. Next out is Metylerca, followed by J is Justice, already wearing a bloody chain around his neck. Justice enters the ring, seemingly cautious of his partner. Colt and littleniach finally stand by one another. Colt slowly offers his hand to littlenaich, who cautiously accepts the handshake.
littlenaich and Metylerca are tied securely by the neck to one another, as is Motor Colt to J is Justice. Both teams grab on to their length of chain tightly before the bell rings. The bell rings and Colt and littlenaich launch themselves at their respective opponents. Colt takes Justice outside and both brawl their way into the crowd, while littlenaich and Metylerca beat on each other in the ring. Justice starts choking Colt out with the chain but Colt grabs the nearby ring bell and hits Justice to free himself. Colt then grabs a nearby chair, but Justice roughly pulls on the chain knocking him down. Justice begins dragging Colt into the crowd, grabbing one fans new "Story" t-shirt and choking out his opponent again.
In the ring, Metylerca wraps his chain around his fist. He goes for a K.O. punch but littlenaich ducks, and hits him with a low blow. littlenaich grabs the chain and wraps it around Metylerca's legs signaling for the Figure Four Leg Lock. Metylerca struggles for the ropes, but is stopped by a whip from the chain. littlenaich locks in the Figure Four with the aid of the chain, as Metylerca screams out in pain. Just as he appears to be tapping, Metylerca nails littlenaich with a punch for the fist still wrapped in chain. He goes for a pin.
ONE...
TWO-littlenaich kicks out!
Both lie collapsed on the mat.
Back in the crowd, Justice is seen tearing at Colt's mask as Colt desperately struggles to keep it on. Justice picks up a chair and aims at Colt's head. Colt ducks and the chair hits a member of security. As other backstage personnel tend to the fallen security guard, Colt grabs a nightstick from one of them and hits Justice with it. Now in control, Colt drags the fallen Justice by the chain back towards the ring.
In the ring, Metylerca leaps over the top rope to the outside, ties up the chain in the ropes and pulls on it. littlenaich struggles to breathe. Just as he appears to be passing out, Colt brains Metylerca with the nightstick from behind, saving his partner. Colt, still dragging Justice behind him enters the ring to check on his partner. Justice revives and yanks the chain, catching Colt off guard and dragging him to the ring apron. As Colt is lying prone and face up, Justice grabs a chair from a fan and hits Colt face on and appearing to break his nose. littlenaich finally reaches his feet, and drags his partner back into the ring, narrowly missing another face first shot. He leaps over the top rope onto Justice and rolls him back into the ring. littlenaich grabs the chair Justice had used and enters the ring. He starts wailing on Justice with multiple chair shots, before collapsing to his knees and going for the pin.
ONE...
TWO...
TH...
littlenaich is dragged out via his chain by Metylerca who then rams him back first into the crowd barricade. Metylerca then whips littlenaich into the steel ring steps and measures up for a lariat. As he moves forward, littlenaich lunges towards him, low catching him off guard and lifting him for a back body drop awkwardly onto the steps. littlenaich clutches his back, grimacing at the pain.
In the ring, both Colt and Justice struggle to get to their feet. Colt manages to get up first, but appears to be the more unsteady, blood covering his face, and dripping to the mat. Colt goes for a right, but Justice easily dodges. Colt goes for a left, but Justice doges again. Colt goes for another right, and Justice catches his fist and attaches the Claw. Colt weakly struggles to escape, his arms flailing and slowly going lifeless. Suddenly Colt catches Justice with a low kick. Justice manages to hold onto the Claw through the pain but eventually lets go as both collapse on the mat. littlenaich makes his way back in and goes for the Figure Four on Justice. Justice yells in pain and Metylerca is about to get to him and pull him out of the move but Colt clotheslines him out of the ring.
Michael Muffer- Here is your winner…………….MOTOR-COLT AND LITTLENAITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After the match Motor-Colt and littlenaitch celebrate and then make their separate exits back to their locker rooms. The ref and medics start taking the collar off of J is Justice but Metylerca pushes them all away and grabs the chain of Justice’s collar. He picks the hurt Justice up and sends him over the top ropes hanging him hang by his neck on the outside. Metylerca starts yelling “you lost us the match!!!” as security finally comes in and saves J is Justice from further injury.
________________________________________
This is Fred G. Neric backstage with Evil Masked wordlifeecw. wordlifeecw, we are just moments away from what promises to be the bloodiest match in WWCF history, the Iron Maiden. How do you feel going into this barbaric encounter?
"..."
Um, well, what about your allegations that TheSam08 is faking his injuries?
"..."
*G. Neric pulls the mic away* Look, for this to work, you need to say something, OK? *G. Neric holds up the mic again* wordlifeecw one final question. What happens if you can't walk out of here tonight?
*wordlifeecw stares at G. Neric, and then grabs the microphone*
"The time for talking is over. I'm ready to go out there and bleed, and I'm ready to make Cthulhu bleed. To answer your question, what happens if I can't walk out of here tonight? Cthulhu is the one who needs to worry about walking anywhere, EVER AGAIN!"
*wordlifeecw hands the microphone back to G. Neric and walks off*
Iron Maiden match
Evil Masked wordlifeecw
VS
Cthulhu aka Providence
(first person to lock their opponent inside the Iron Maiden wins the match. This match also has barbed wire ring ropes and Iron Maiden songs playing over the PA system)
Evil Masked wordlifeecw is out to the ring first for this match, which promises to be the most violent match in wrestling history. Cthulhu arrives and we have our first staredown, when Cthulhu suddenly sprays wordlifeecw with black mist, followed by a kick to the gut. Cthulhu then locks in the mandible claw. wordlifeecw however, counters with a choke-hold, attempt for a chokeslam. When wordlifeecw lifts Cthulhu up into the air, Cthulhu manages to counter with an enzuigiri. As Cthulhu tries to catch his breath, wordlifeecw sits up and attempts another chokeslam, this time succeeding, chokeslamming Cthulhu out of the ring.
The Evil Masked One follows Cthulhu to the outside and drags him towards the Iron Maiden. As it opens, wordlifeecw begins to lift Cthulhu into the Iron Maiden, but Cthulhu jabs his thumb in wordlifeecw’s eye, forcing him to release his grip. Cthulhu snaps off a suplex, and begins stomping his masked opponent. Cthulhu grabs a chair and places it around wordlifeecw’s right arm, and gets on the ring apron. Cthulhu goes to stomp the arm, but wordlifeecw rolls out of the way. Cthulhu charges wordlifeecw, but gets met with a clothesline by an arm still caught in a chair. The Evil One pulls the chair off his arm and goes to hit Cthulhu with it, but Cthulhu kicks the chair back in wordlifeecw’s face. Cthulhu then reaches under the ring and pulls out a bottle and breaks it over wordlifeecw’s head, causing glass to shatter everywhere.
The fight soon becomes a no-holds barred fist-fight outside the ring. Evil Masked wordlifeecw gets the upper hand after a series of brutal punches on Cthulhu, finishing the combination with a Reverse DDT on the unprotected floor. Instead of dragging Cthulhu into the Iron Maiden wordlifeecw lifts up Cthulhu and tosses him back into the ring. With the ring ropes replaced by barbed wire Evil Masked uses the opportunity to execute a Snake Eyes on his half-conscious opponent. Cthulhu is now down on the ring, cut open and bleeding.
However, Cthulhu seems to have gone berserk after getting cut by the barbed wire, who managed to quickly get back up on his feet and was able to hit wordlife with a devastating punch to the groin. wordlifeecw is momentarily stunned, giving enough time for Cthulhu to take a chair outside and deliver a one-chair, one-man con-chair-to on him. Cthulhu drops the chair on Evil Masked's head and connects with a leg drop, followed by a flying elbow from the top turnbuckle. Finally Cthulhu lifts Evil Masked up and pushes him to the barbed wire ropes -- which wrap around the Evil Masked one causing him to get cut all over his body. Evil Masked wordlifeecw is then tackled by Cthulhu and both fall outside the ring.
This time, Cthulhu signals to open the Iron Maiden, and he starts dragging Evil Masked towards it by wrapping the barbed wire around wordlifeecw's throat and pulling at it. Before they could reach the Iron Maiden, Evil Masked gets back up on two feet, and hit Cthulhu with a lariat. Evil Masked grabs Cthulhu and lifts him up for the Journey to Hell, but Cthulhu starts hitting wordlifeecw with his fist wrapped in barbed wire. In the end, Cthulhu fails as instinct helps wordlifeecw to hit with his finisher.
Wordlifeecw starts to place Cthulhu in the Iron Maiden, but Cthulhu, in an act of desperation, low blows him with his barbed wired fist. Cthulhu picks up the Evil Masked One and rams his head into the side of the Iron Maiden. He then picks up wordlifeecw for a piledriver. With the Evil One in a bad way, Cthulhu grabs a table from underneath the ring. Cthulhu sets it up near the Iron Maiden, places wordlifeecw on top, and goes to the top turnbuckle. He goes for a frogs splash, but wordlifeecw moves at the last second, causing Cthulhu to hit solid concrete.
Both men are down now, and a close up camera shot shows blood trickling down from under wordlifeecw’s mask. Wordlifeecw is up, but amazingly, so is Cthulhu. Wordlifeecw tries to get back in the ring, but Cthulhu hit’s a lung blower, sending both of them back to the floor. Cthulhu is up first, and he grabs wordlifeecw and sets him up for the Death Magnetic. He hits it and drags wordlifeecw towards the Iron Maiden. He tries to shove him inside, but wordlifeecw grabs the door and slams it in Cthulhu’s face. Cthulhu crawls back towards the ring, but wordlifeecw follows.
Cthulhu has his chain out and meets wordlifeecw with a hard right. wordlifeecw blocks the blow, grabs the chain, and uses it to apply a camel clutch. Cthulhu struggles to get free, finally standing up with wordlifeecw on his back and falling backwards, forcing him to break the hold. As wordlifeecw stands up, Cthulhu connects with a shining wizard, but the Evil One is unphased, and retaliates with a chokeslam. As he drags Cthulhu to the Iron Maiden, Cthulu somehow gets to his feet as they engage in one final fistfight. wordlifeecw gains the upper hand, pummeling Cthulhu until he’s a bloody mess. wordlifeecw then drags Cthulhu to the Iron Maiden, leaving a trail of blood behind them, and helps him stand up, only to shove him inside and slam the door shut, winning the match.
Michael Muffer- Here is your winner…………….EVIL MAKSED WORDLIFEECW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
________________________________________
(Fred G. Neric meets up backstage with WWCF Commissioner Amigo)
G. Neric- Commissioner Amigo Family Reigns has been going great but something has been bothering me. We still haven’t seen the The Return Of The WWCF Legend that we were promised. At first I thought it was going to be Seth Drakin but rumors are going around that he wasn’t the one that the promos were talking about. Do you know anything about this?
Commissioner Amigo- Oh I know all about it for I set it all up myself. Don’t worry G. Neric. The Returning Legend I have resigned will make his impact before the night is over.
(Commissioner Amigo walks away leaving G. Neric confused.)
MAIN EVENT
WWCF World Heavyweight Title and WWCF Inter-Forum Title tag team match
MiLo Duck (c) and Above Average (c)
VS
Tyfo and TromboneMan
special guest referee - The Sam
(The main event is about to start and The Sam comes out first in his referee shirt to his Sam08 Family theme music. The crowd boos and chants “Platypus!”.)
(Michael Muffer gets on the mic in the middle of the ring.)
Michael Muffer- Ladies and Gentlemen it is now time for our Main Event!!!!!!! Tonight we are going to witness one of the most anticipated matches in World WrestleCrap Federation history for the Inter-Forum Championship and World Heavyweight Championship of the WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!
Are you ready???
(The crowd cheers)
I said are you reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaady!!!!!???)
(The crowd cheers)
Well for the thousands in attendance. And the millions watching around the world. From the Parts Unknown Arena in Parts Unknown, USA. Ladies and Gentlemen.
LETS GET READY TO GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBBBBBBBLLLLLLEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(The Sam08 Family theme hits the PA and Tyfo and TromboneMan make their way down to the ring.)
Michael Muffer- Making their way down to the ring representing The Sam08 Family at a combined weight of 480 pounds………….TYFO AND TROMBONEMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Above Average and MiLo Duck make their way to the ring.)
Michael Muffer- And their opponents at a total combined weight of 510 pounds the WWCF World Heavyweight Champion and Inter-Forum Champion…………………..MILO DUCK AND ABOVE AVERAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The match begins with Tyfo and Above Average. Above Average takes the early advantage and backs Tyfo into a corner. He starts laying into Tyfo with right hands and stomps him to the ground. The Sam steps in and pushes Tyfo back telling him to the break it as the crowd boos. The Sam gets down to Tyfo and whispers something to him and then lets Tyfo get back up. Above Average charges at Tyfo but Tyfo does a drop toe hold on Above Average making Above Average’s face crash right into the bottom turnbuckle. Tyfo picks up Above Average and delivers a big scoop slam. Tyfo goes for the cover and The Sam goes for a fast count but Above Average kicks out just in time.
Tyfo picks up Above Average and tags in TromboneMan. Tyfo holds Above Average’s arm up and lets TromboneMan kick him in the rib. TromboneMan picks up Above Average in a fireman’s carry to go for a samoan drop but Above Average wiggles out of it and goes for a roll up pin. The Sam gets down as slow as he can and TromboneMan kicks out before he can even make a one count. Above Average shoves The Sam and argues the slow count and The Sam threatens to disqualify Average and MiLo even though everyone knows he won’t possibly do that for it will lose the Family’s chance to get the belts.
As Average is arguing with The Sam TromboneMan comes behind with a vicious elbow to Average’s spine knocking him off balance. TromboneMan goes for another but Average hits a martial arts side kick to TromboneMan’s gut and irish whips him into his and MiLo’s corner. Above Average tags in MiLo Duck who receives a big pop from the crowd. MiLo comes in and gets on the second rope and delivers ten big punches to TromboneMan’s head. MiLo jumps off and is about to continue the attack on TromboneMan but The Sam pulls him away and admonishes him. MiLo pushes The Sam out of the way but is met by a rake to the eyes by TromboneMan who also hits a back elbow to Above Average knocking him off the apron.
TromboneMan grabs MiLo and delivers a belly to belly suplex. He drags MiLo over to his and Tyfo’s corner and delivers a scoop slam to MiLo and then tags in Tyfo who goes to the top rope and hits a big top rope leg drop. Tyfo goes for the cover and The Sam tries to make a fast count but Above Average runs in and breaks up the count. The Sam pulls Above Average back to his corner as Tyfo picks up MiLo and him and TromboneMan start double teaming MiLo in their corner choking him with the tag rope as Tyfo kicks MiLo in the gut. Above Average yells at The Sam to turn around to see what is going on and The Sam turns around to see what is going on and then immediately looks back at Above Average starting to admonish him again to let TromboneMan and Tyfo keep doing damage to MiLo.
Tyfo tags in TromboneMan and they hit a double back breaker on MiLo. They start delivering boots to MiLo as The Sam makes the slowest five count in the history of forever. Above Average tries to come back in and break it up but The Sam runs over to him and drags him back to his corner. While that happens TromboneMan and Tyfo pick up MiLo and irish whip him from one rope to the other and go for a double clothesline but MiLo ducks it and comes back and hits a huge double clothesline on Tyfo and TromboneMan.
All three men are on the apron now and MiLo crawls to get to his partner. The Sam grabs MiLo’s leg yelling “ I forgot to him for foreign objects!!!!” as the crowd boos. MiLo kicks The Sam back and gets the hot tag to Above Average who comes in a house a fire. He delivers a clothesline to Tyfo and then one to TromboneMan. He delivers a big scoops slam to Tyfo and then to TromboneMan. Above Average delivers a Superkick to Tyfo knocking him out of the ring and then puts TromboneMan in the sleeper. The Sam acts like he trips although it is obvious it isn’t an accident and falls into Above Average breaking the hold. Above Average starts arguing with The Sam as Tyfo comes up back into the ring behind Above Average and goes for a german suplex. Above Average blocks it and elbows Tyfo in the head knocking him back and then delivers a devastating Discus Punch on Tyfo knocking him out. The Sam starts pushing Above Average but Above Average pushes The Sam to the ground and then tags in MiLo who picks up TromboneMan. TromboneMan goes for the eye poke but MiLo blocks it three stooges style and kicks TromboneMan in the gut and picks him up and hits the QUAKERJACK. The Sam stands back and acts like he has something in his eyes so he can’t make the count but Above Average hits The Sam with a Superkick knocking him out right to the ground beside where MiLo has TromboneMan covered. Above Average runs over to knocked out Sam and picks his arm up three times making the three count. MiLo and Above throw both Sam and TromboneMan out of the ring onto Tyfo and celebrate with the Championship belts in their hands.
Michael Muffer- Winners and still WWCF World Heavyweight Champion and Inter-Forum Champion………………………..MILO DUCK AND ABOVE AVERAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MiLo and Above Average continues to celebrate in the ring when something comes up on the crapatron.
Tonight a WWCF Legend Returns…………………………………
……………NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Operation Ground and Pound by DragonForce blasts over the PA system)
(THE TANK makes his entrance and walks down to the ring. He gets in and stares at Above Average and MiLo Duck. The Tank lets his stylish shirt sleeve loose and to reveal that he was hiding a lead pipe which slides down to his hand. He nails Above Average with it in the head. MiLo tries to hit The Tank with the World Title but The Tank ducks it and nails MiLo in the head with the lead pipe. The Tank picks up MiLo and hits a rock bottom.)
Story members Motor-Colt and Evil Masked wordlifeecw as well as Stryker run down to the ring to chase off The Tank who escapes through the crowd and looks back and taunts them as Operation Ground and Pound by DragonForce begins to play again.)
Fade to Black
