Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Ernest Goes To Wargames - February 23, 2009


Ernest Goes To Wargames

*A desk is set up in the ring, with Commisioner Amigo sat at one side. The bagpipes and drums hit, and out comes Stryker, moving straight to the ring. Michael Muffer goes to announce his entrance, but Stryker has a mic and cuts him off. He steps into the ring and sits at the desk opposite Amigo*

Well, Stryker, it seems that nothing can get thru that head of yours that no amount of protesting about the Title shot will fix this situation. It is set in stone, and will not be reversed. You may speak.

I believe you just gave me my cue to talk. You've had your say, and you tell me I don't get it? I don't think you or anybody else has been listening to what I've said. Maybe I've been too cocky about it, 'Franchise this' and 'Cornerstone that'. So let me cut away the frills and tell you a story.

11 years ago, I was a troubled kid who wanted to be a wrestler. I went to local shows and spoke to the 'big' names there, and begged someone to train me. Only one guy took me up on it, and even he only did it to shut me up. His name was Derek Liddell. Big D. He was past his best, out of condition, and only worked because it was his company and aside from his two sons he was the only draw they had. And he taught me the ropes, he got me bumping, I learned to work and then one day, when I was just 14, he asked me if I wanted to work a tag match with him. I figuratively bit his hand off. Then and there he presented me with a light blue singlet with a bolt of lightning on the front, and told me I was going to be his kayfabe son, Flash Liddell, an idea which his sons had come up with, as I became closer and closer to the family, when I didn't have a family to rely on of my own. I was bad, really bad at everything except a dropkick, a splash and the fact because of my size and youth I could bump like Curt Hennig if he were made of rubber. But Derek nursed me through those matches. He spoke to me, talked to me, called the match for me until I got it. I worked the majority of the match so Derek didn't have to, because he couldn't. He was my mind, and I was his body. He gave me everything I needed to make a go of a childhood dream. But time moved on, and I was getting older, and getting ready to move away for university. Wrestling at that point was the only constant in my life. Drink, drugs, they'd taken hold of me everywhere but the ring. I was leaving, and Derek was losing the only reason he had kept actively working as much as he did. We did the usual thing, I turned on him, we had a feud, Derek had his last singles matches, I had my first really meaningful singles matches. We gimmicked them to hell to make up for both our shortcomings, and they entertained. My last night came around, I put Derek over, and he shook my hand and wished me well, giving me a list of promoters to call when I got to Uni.

When I got to my new promotion, I had the chance to evolve as a character, and that's where my name comes from today, but that clustersmurf of a promotion had no Father figure, noone keeping it together, and the final clean part of my life disappeared. I had a few good matches, but mostly they were badly booked, badly called and badly operated.

Then one day I got a call from Steve, Derek's older son. Derek had died. And that second, I got hit with a wave of guilt I had never experienced before. The last time I had been seen in public with Derek Liddell had been in a ring in anger. It was only an angle, but perception is a huge thing. I left that memory, and worst of all, I never got to say thank you to Derek for what he had done for me, because I didn't know what it was.

Time has passed, and a lot of changes have happened. My body has broken down, and I'm patched up enough to be here at WWCF because I still have that same burning passion for Wrestling as I did so many years ago. And you'd think I'd learned my lesson, but then a few months ago, Square got in my head, and I nearly betrayed the man who gave me my chance to break back into wrestling when he sent me the message saying "Let's form a team".

You offer me this seemingly golden opportunity. King, after his recent comments, that title is a joke, King Motor-Colt has the gall to mock me for not taking it. You threaten to give it to the people who have done nothing but try and tear this promotion apart instead. You think I'm not greatful that you see my World Title potential? I thank you and the board of directors a thousand times for that, but as Milo is still champion, I JUST! CAN'T! TAKE! IT! What we have is short, and do you really think I could step in the ring with a tag partner again, knowing I may never get a chance to thank them properly or work with them again?

You call me disrespectful and ungrateful? How disrespectful and ungrateful is it to try and force the people who made this promotion what it is, and allow you to wield your power, to take up arms against each other? Commissioner? It's a joke. You disgust me, and if you can't see what you're trying to do is wrong, then you have forgotten your roots. You have forgotten what it's like to lace up your boots and step in this ring as a wrestler. You've forgotten loyalty to the people who put you where you are.

You sneer at my principles? That's your prerogative, but you know I'm right. Deep down, you know that sooner or later, someone above your head is going to say "let's give that guy what he wants, he deserves it". But you know what else? You've made your bed too Amigo. And when they say that about me, they're going to say you've failed as a Commissioner, because you didn't recognize it soon enough. Tonight I represent Milo in wargames. I'm standing up for him, for Wrestlecrap, for NFXW, for SWCCW and for Derek Liddell, and I do and always do when I step into this ring. You take advantage of your time left after this though Amigo, and you set me the toughest challenges you can, because the only way you're going to stop me, is by stopping me from stepping out permanently. I will Stry...

ke out. Yes, I've heard it all before. Quite the story, a bit different then how I got in. But, every time you aim for a new challenge, I can not help but crack a snicker deep down inside. For I do not think you truly know what you are doing. In your quest to avoid a title shot, you are making it into a reality. How do you think that title shots are awarded normally. By winning matches, which you are doing. The more challenges you win, the more you edge closer to Milo. Or perhaps Motor-Colt. You can continue it if you want, but it's all up to you.

I tell you what! Motor-Colt cheats his way to a win tonight? I'll take him on for that World Title at the first opportunity. If Milo wins, and I STILL don't get a shot at a different title? You're going to bring a whole world of chaos down own you

*Stryker rises and walks up to Amigo, face to face*

I will! Stryke you out!


*A video plays, showcasing the storylines leading up to tonight’s event*

Michael Muffer: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Ernest Goes To Wargames!


Triple Threat Match To Determine The Number One Contender To The Heatz!!1 Championship: Jonathan Michaels V. KGX V. Brahma Bull

Michael Muffer: This opening match is a TRIPLE THREAT MATCH TO DETERMINE THE NUMBER 1 CONTENDER FOR THE HEATZ!!1 CHAMPIONSHIP, AND IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!

*Dead and Bloated by Stone Temple Pilots kicks in, KGX struts through the curtain and walks confidently down the ramp*

Michael Muffer: Making his way to the ring, from The Emerald City, weighing in at two hundred and TWWWENTY POOOUNDS, K!G!X!

*KGX gestures to the crowd, drawing boos and insults from the fans at ringside. Original Prankster by The Offspring kicks in, breaking KGX's stride. Jonathan Michaels walks to the ring surrounded by dry ice*

Michael Muffer: Introducing our second competitor, from Los Angeles, California, weighing in at two hundred and FORTY! POOOOOUNDS, JOOOOONATHAN MIIIIIIIIIICHAEEEEEEEEEEELS

*As JM reaches the ring, KGX begins gesturing and taunting him, causing JM to raise his fist, but the referee steps between them. Never gonna give you up by Rick Astley blares out, and the crowd boos uproariously as Brahma Bull shuffles his way out.*

Michael Muffer: And our final competitor, from Glasgow, Scotland, weighing in at two hundred and NINETEEN POOOOUUUUNDS, BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAHMAAAAAAAA BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULLLLLLL

The three men face off in the ring, with KGX still jawing away. The bell rings and both JM and BB rush the cocky KGX and start raining in the punches on him, dropping him to the mat. BB kicks KGX hard in the chest, raising pained "oooohs" from the crowd. JM follows suit, and again BB, with KGX shouting out at the sharp impact of each blow as he gets the air kicked out of him. JM shakes his head, pushes BB to one side and takes a running kick straight to the chest and shoulder of KGX, laying him flat. BB takes exception to being shoved and rushes the much bigger JM throwing uppercuts and knees. JM reels away but BB leaps onto his back and starts savagely biting his ear. JM yells out in pain and struggles to fight off BB, and the referee tries to pull BB off JM's back, but to no avail. JM pushes the referee out of the way, grabs BB's legs from behind his back, and swings him round HARD with a sidewalk slam, crashing him into the mat.

JM goes for the lateral press, with one hand on his bleeding ear, but KGX breaks it up at 1. KGX, with his chest red raw yells "You wanna kick huh?!" and starts throwing vicious kicks to the thighs and sides of JM who retreats to the corner. KGX charges in with a YAKUZA KICK!! JM slumps down in the corner, and KGX charges in with a running shin right to his face.

Turning his attention to BB who is struggling back to his feet KGX goes for the Running Tornado DDT, but BB is light footed enough to step to one side and hit a GAMANGIRI, flooring KGX. He grabs KGX, and SPITS THE ZOMBIE POISON MIST INTO HIS FACE! KGX scrambles around, scratching at his eyes. BB hits an uppercut on him as he staggers away, before running off the ropes AND LAUNCHING INTO A SPEER! He got all his weight behind that, and sends the much bigger man to the floor outside.

BB moves over to the semi-concious JM and drags him to his feet. Kick to the gut, ZOMBIE PEDIGREE!! BB rolls him over...HE'S BITING HIS FACE! BITING HIS FACE AND RAINING IN PUNCHES!! THE REFEREE CALLS FOR THE BELL!!

Michael Muffer: Ladies and Gentleman, the referee has stopped the match. Your winner by way of Technical Knockout, and your NEWWWWWWWWWWW NUMBER ONE CONTENDER FOR THE HEATZ!!1 CHAMPIONSHIP, BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAHHHMMMMMAAAAAAAAAAAA BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULL!


Number One Contender’s Match For The WWCF World Tag Team Championship: Whitey Fats and TTS V. The Non-American Heroes: Square and Starshine

The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is to determine the number one contenders for the WWCF World Tag Team Championship!
(The NAH’s music hits)
Introducing first, weighing in at a total combined weight of 440 pounds, Square, Starshine, The Non-American Heroes!
(Whitey’s theme plays over the PA)
And their opponents, weighing in at a total combined weight of 570 pounds, the team of Whitey “Daddy Phat Sax” Fats and TTS!

Square and Whitey start off the match for their teams. Square starts off by sending Whitey into the ropes and meeting him on the way back with a dropkick. He follows up with a fist drop, and tags in Starshine. Star works over Whitey’s shoulder with hammer strikes and chops, before applying a shoulder lock. Whitey fights his way loose, but before he can reach his corner, Starshine hit’s the Blindspot, and pulls Whitey back to the NAH’s corner. Square tags back in and continues to work the shoulder of Whitey. Square grapevines the arm and wrenches back, causing Whitey to cry out, but he refuses to submit. With TTS and the crowd rallying behind him, he manages to stand up and slam Square down to the mat. Both men crawl towards their corners. Square tags in Starshine, and Whitey tags TTS.

TTS fires off a series of punches at Starshine, followed by a scoop slam. As Star writhes in pain on the mat, TTS bounces off the ropes with a splash, getting a near fall. Undeterred, TTS picks up Star and hit’s a back suplex for another near fall. TTS lifts up Starshine for another one, but Starshine rakes the eyes and hits an Edge-O-Matic on TTS. He drags him back to his corner and tags Square back in. Square kicks TTS a few times, and taunts him, but TTS surprises him with a rollup, getting a 2-count. Square tries whipping TTS into the ropes, but it’s reversed, and Square takes a big back body drop. With the NAH on the ropes, TTS tags in Whitey to try and end it.

Whitey hit’s a lariat on Square, and follows up with a top rope elbow drop, but Starshine breaks up the pin attempt. TTS comes in and dispatches Starshine, but this allows Square to roll Whitey up. With a handful tights, Square gets the pinfall, and the win for his team.

Here are your winners, and number one contenders to the WWCF Tag Team Championship, Square and Starshine, The Non-American Heroes!


Work Rate Match: Latino Meat V. SuperSmark

The following is a Work Rate match! In this match, closed fists, chokes, and use of the ropes as a weapon will result in an immediate disqualification. There is also a 20 count outside of the ring, instead of the usual 10-count. Each competitor has 3 rope breaks at their disposal. Once they have used them up, they cannot break a hold by grabbing the ropes.
(Dirty Deeds Done Cheap by AC/DC plays over the PA)
Introducing first, from Ann Arbor, Michigan, weighing in at 220 pounds, SuperSmark!
(Back Door Man by The Doors plays)
And his opponent, hailing from Your Mom’s House, and weighing 235 pounds, Latino Meat!

Meat and Smark lock up in the center of the ring. Meat arm drags Smark and ties up the shoulder, but Smark slides out and surprises Meat with a German suplex. A cover only yields a 1-count, however. Meat is up and hit’s a Latin leg sweep, followed by a standing moonsault. Cover, 1-2-kick out. Meat pulls Smark up and goes for a butterfly suplex, but Smark counters with a western lariat, followed by an elbow drop. Cover, 1-2-kick out. Smark locks on the Sharpshooter, but Meat gets to the ropes.

Latino Meat has two rope breaks remaining.

Smark works over Meat’s leg some more, and applies a Figure Four Leg Lock. Meat again reaches the ropes.

Latino Meat now has one rope break remaining.

Smark goes for another Figure Four, but Meat cradles him for a 2-count. Meat starts a comeback, hitting a dropkick, followed by running crescent kick. Meat applies a rear chinlock, but Smark fights out of it, and mounts Meat. With Meat pinned down, Smark begins nailing him with MMA-style elbows to the head. After about 5 strikes, the referee pulls Smark off, and checks on Latino Meat. He’s about to stop the match, but Meat springs to his feet, ready for more. Smark charges, but is met with a back body drop. Meat builds a head of steam, tossing Smark into the corner and hitting a big splash. With Smark reeling, Meat comes off the ropes with a flying shoulder tackle. He goes to the top for the Meat Compactor, but Smark rolls out of the way just in time, causing Meat to eat canvas. Smark moves quickly, locking in the Cattle Mutilation. With the hold cinched in in the center of the ring, Latino Meat struggles to get free, but has nowhere to go, and taps out.

Here is your winner, SuperSmark!


Hardcore Championship Contender’s Match: Eli V. “Evil La Parka” V. Madman Szalinski

Muffer: Ladies and Gentlemen The next match is a triple threat match for the #1 contendership of the Hardcore Title! Introducing First, the former Color man of the WWCF, MADMAN SZALINSKI!

*Madman is seen pushing a shopping cart full of plunder down to the ring*

Muffer: Introducing next, representing The Crusade, EVIL LA PARKA!

*The mysterious hooded figure comes down the ramp carrying his prized weapon, the steal folding chair*

Muffer: And finally, representing the Wargame Warriors, ELI!!!

*Eli comes out flanked by Krazy-E and Stevie, who brought some plunder of their own*

The bell rings and we are underway. Eli starts by going after LaParka with kicks and punches while Madman goes outside the ring and picks up a plate of glass and a few folding chairs. He re-enters the ring and Waffles Eli with the chair.

Madman sets La Parka on the glass between the two chairs and then goes to the top rope and comes off with a huge elbow drop through La Parka and the glass as the crowd comes alive!

Just as Madman begins to crawl over to his masked rival, Eli comes up behind him and begins stabbing Szalinski with a shard of glass right in the forehead, busting him open! Eli then hits a powerbomb onto the back of one of the chairs on Szalinski and goes for the cover.

1..2.. WHAM!!!

The disturbing thud of steel chair meeting spine reverberates throughout the WWCF arena as La Parka crushes Eli with the chair and continues working her over. Stevie then hits the ring and takes out La Parka with a steel pipe in an act not unlike what happened between Eli and The Crusade a few weeks back. All three combantants are down as the crowd comes to their feet.

Szalinski is the first to his feet and is wearing the crimson mask as he gets out of the ring and sets up a table. He also grabs a bunch of tacks and throws them on top of the table. He takes Eli up top and hits a Superplex on her through the table with the tacks on it!!! He crawls over to cover her...

1..2..

the ref's hand never hits the mat for three as La Parka pulls him out of the ring and hits the ref with a steel chair. La Parka then gets in the ring and finds a barb-wire 2X4 and starts going to town on Eli and Madman, busting Eli open and further injuring a wounded Szalinski. La Parka then goes under the ring and finds a can of lighter fluid and sprays it all over his chair while a second official comes out to take the place of his fallen brother.

One little light later and The Flame Chair was given life. He sets up to clock Eli, but she skillfully moves out of the way and kicks La Parka in the gut. While the flaming chair in on the mat she signals for the Machinegun, but is caught in mid air by La Parka who puts Eli back first into the flames with a powerslam. La Parka then hits a recovering Madman in the head with the barb-wire 2x4 one more top before ascending to the top rope. He hits the X-Ray on Eli and gets the 3 count to become the new #1 contender to the Hardcore title.

Muffer: Here is your winner, and number one contender to the WWCF Hardcore Championship, “Evil La Parka”!!!


Match for the Heatz!!1! Championship: Viva Los Bio Dome [c] V. Koda

Viva and Koda lock up at the start with Koda gaining the advantage, putting Viva in a headlock. Viva fights out with a couple of elbows and runs to the ropes. On the rebound he hits Koda with a clothesline but Koda rolls backward with the momentum right back to his feet. He cackles a bit then arm drags Viva to the ground and follows it up with an elbow drop. He goes for another elbow drop but Viva moves out of the way. Both men get back to their feet and have a stare down.

Viva breaks the stare down by charging at Koda. Koda moves out of the way but Viva scouts it and grabs Koda's arm. Viva leaps over the top rope and pulls Koda's arm down, wrenching in on the top rope. Koda's arm snaps back and nearly causes him to fall down as Viva slides back into the ring. Viva grabs the same arm and wrenches it, bringing Koda to his knees. He holds Koda there for a minute but Koda grabs his leg and trips him, breaking the hold.

Koda attacks quickly with a series of punches, trying to wear down Viva's defenses. Viva manages to get to his feet though, and the two start trading vicious punches back and forth. Viva manages to get a slight upper hand, but when he goes for a clothesline Koda hits a belly-to-belly suplex. He picks up Viva and sets up for the Killing Joke but Viva counters and irish whips Koda into the turnbuckle. Viva charges at Koda but Koda moves out of the way at the last minute. Viva rams into the turnbuckle which stuns him. Koda leaps to the second rope and grabs Viva's neck. Koda connects with the Killing Joke by jumping off the top rope and pins Viva for the win.

Muffer: Here is your winner, and the NEW Heatz!!1 Champion, KODA!!!


*Aaron is seen backstage finishing a book*
Tonight is the Wargames match, and I have been able to win myself onto Motor-Colt's team. The other team, especially Seth, thinks that because I'm on this team I must automatically hate them too. This is not the case. I mean hell, Cthulhu is on my team we definitely see eye-to-eye. Seth if you want to fight me we can do so after this match, or during it. I really don't care when, but tonight is a bigger picture. Tonight me and my team will win this match, and once Motor-Colt wins the title as well, it'll be the perfect ending to a great mystery, or as Motor-Colt would say, we'd be the Story on Page One. So Seth, you and your team tonight had better learn to Know Your Enemy.


WWCF World Championship Match: Motor-Colt V. MiLo Duck [c]

*The lights go down sending the crowd into a hush, followed by organ chords. Phantom of the Opera kicks in as the lights go back up, and through the dry ice, Motor-Colt is seen standing with his back to the ramp and the ring, bringing the crowd to their feet. He raises his hand and points his finger skyward, then turns and walks, quickly, intently, focused to the ring. He rolls in and repeats the point in the centre of the ring, and then in a corner. The song fades out, leaving MC in the ring, as the crowd starts the "QUACK QUACK QUACK" chants. Darkwing Duck
kicks in and the crowd explodes again. Milo walks to the ring, staring at Motor-Colt, unwavering. He walks up the steps, then into the ring, climbing a turnbuckle to acknowledge the 'Quacks' of his fans. He stands down too, as both men stretch and limber up.*

Michael Muffer: The following match is scheduled for ONE FALL! And it is for the WRESTLECRAP WRESTLING FEDERATION WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP! On my left is the challenger. He hails from The Daily Story, Adelaide, from the land down under, Australia. He is the current reigning KING of WRESTLECRAP! Weighing in tonight at TWO HUNDRED and FORTY SEVEN POUUUNDS...KIIIIIIIIING MOOOOOOOOTOOOOOOOOOOR-COOOOOOOOOLT!!

*The Ref shows the title belt to MC, who nods intently to himself, and points to himself, mouthing "MINE!" at Milo.*

Michael Muffer: And standing on my right, hailing from the town of EMMONS, MINNESOOOTAAA, he is the current, and longest running WRESTLECRAP WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION. He weighed in tonight at TWO HUNDRED and FIFTY POOOOOOOOUNDS....MIIIIIIIIIIIIIILOOOOOOOOOOO DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

*The referee holds up the belt to the crowd as Milo stares, unblinking at MC. The ref hands the belt to a ringside official as Michael Muffer leaves the ring*

The bell rings and we're underway with the pair circling the ring, marking out their zones. MC drops to a knee trying to grab the leg of Milo, but he steps handily away. Adopting an MMA stance, Milo feints a kick at MC, but he remains out of reach. Milo offers a hand, in line with Stryker Duck Silence's code of honor, but MC spits on the canvas between them and steps forward. Milo refuses to back down and the pair end up forehead to forehead, nose to nose, leaning hard into each other, both trying to psyche the other into making the first move. MC FEINTS THE EUROPEAN UPPERCUT, making Milo flinch away. MC smirks and rocks back against the ropes, but Milo is wound up and charges MC, and the pair start exchanging blows but are against the ropes and referee is forced to step in and separate them. Both men look like they could snap at any minute...MILO SLAPS MC ACROSS THE FACE! MC charges Milo and the pair lock up. The even weights mean neither gets the advantage, so the pair split and charge at each other again, the clash taking the pair to the mat. Both men twist on the canvas, trying to grab purchase on the other to apply a hold. MC makes a lunge and takes Milo's arm, trying to lock on the armbar, but Milo is quick to his feet, and runs out of the hold. He comes back off the ropes and tries to drop a knee, but MC is up and avoids it and drops an elbow, but Milo is up himself. He charges with a boot, but MC rolls through. MC runs at Milo looking for a European Uppercut, but Milo catches the arm and brings him over with an Armdrag, MC is shocked but charges again and gets caught with another Armdrag. MC once again charges and gets grabbed with another Armdrag, but lands on his feet and tries to take Milo over with a hiptoss which is blocked! Standing switch and Milo tries to take advantage again, but MC slips behind with the waistlock, another standing switch by Milo, but MC throws elbows to Milo's jaw, and switches back again, then TAKES HIM OVER WITH A GERMAN SUPLEX. He keeps his hands locked and bridges for the pin, one, tw..SHOULDER UP. MC rolls over and goes for a second German Suplex, but Milo wraps his leg around MC's and blocks it. MC changes his weight though and goes for RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Lateral press 1-2-Milo kicks out.

MC stands kicks the seated Milo in the chest. He runs and comes back off the ropes with a low dropkick, laying out Milo again. Now, MC is stalking Milo from the corner, he's waiting for the Shining Wizard. Milo stirs and MC charges...BUT MILO GRABS A LEG, AND ROLLS THROUGH WITH THE BOSTON CRAB!! Milo is groggy and doesn't have too much weight on the hold, but MC is still forced to struggle round. He tries to power out of the hold, but it backfires and gets extra weight applied. The quacks ring out from the crowd, as Milo cranks up the hold. It looks as though MC may tap, but he stretches out AND JUST GETS A FINGER TO THE ROPES!! The referee starts the 5 count, and Milo breaks at 4.

Milo is breathing hard as MC rolls beneath the bottom rope to gather himself.

Milo moves in on MC who rolls to the outside. MC holding his lower back, and leans back against the guard rail. Milo runs across the ring, the duck could be about to fly...FLYING CLOTHESLINE THROUGH THE ROPES, SANDWICHING MC AGAINST THE RAIL. MC looks in a bad way, but the suicide dive has taken a lot out of Milo too. He's first to his feet, and drags MC to his feet, rolling him into the ring. Milo follows and scoops up MC and locks the ABDOMINAL STRETCH! MC can't have much left after the punishment his midriff has taken! Milo cranks back on the hold, looking for the submission. The referee is checking to see if MC wants to give up, but he shakes his head. He kicks up, grabs Milo's head and DROPS TO HIS KNEES! JAWBREAKER! He wheels around and hits the DIVING EUROPEAN UPPERCUT!! Cover, 1-2, NO! Milo kicks out.

MC struggles to his feet, wraps his arm around Milo and PULLS BACK INTO THE DRAGON CLUTCH! Milo's turn to struggle now, but he manages to throw a hard elbow to the stomach and then one to the chest of MC breaking the hold! Milo staggers free, but MC comes off the ropes with a Million Dollar Kneelift! Milo could be in trouble here! He gets back to his feet, but MC comes off the ropes and hits the Running Neckbreaker! MC is up top and as Milo rises again, he comes off the top...FLYING FOREARM!! Hook of the leg, 1-2-MILO KICKS UP AND ROLLS THROUGH!! CRADLE ROLL UP!! 1-2-REVERSAL BY MC BACK INTO AN INSIDE CRADLE 1-2-WAIT!! MC HAS SCOOPED UP MILO! INVERTED SUPLEX...STORY ON PAGE ONE!! MC COVERS! 1-2-3! THE REFEREE CALLS FOR THE BELL!

Michael Muffer: HERE IS YOUR WINNER, AND NEEEEEEEEWWWWWW WRESTLECRAP WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION....KING MOOOOOOOOTOOOOOOOOOR-COOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLT!


Wargames Match: Team Motor-Colt(Evil Masked wordlifeecw, Above Average, Cthulhu, Little Naitch, and Aaron Enigma) V. Team MiLo(Stryker Dark Silence, Seth Drakin, Tyfo, The Tank, and grbjazzman)

Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for Wargames! The rules of the match are as follows. One man from each team will begin the match. The match will consist of one 5 minute period and seven 2 minute periods. At the end of the 5 minute period, there will be a coin toss. The team that wins the coin toss will receive a one man advantage throughout the match. Once all ten men have entered, the Match Beyond begins. The match can only be won by submission or surrender once all ten men have entered the match. The winning team members will be named the number one contenders to the WWCF World Heavyweight Championship! And now, introducing our teams…

(Motor-Colt’s music plays, as Above Average and wordlifeecw makes their way to the ring)
Introducing first, representing The Story, Team Motor-Colt members, Evil Masked wordlifeecw and Above Average!
(Cthulhu’s music plays)
Making his way to the ring, a member of Team Motor-Colt, CTHULHU!!!
“Elementary, my dear Watson!”
(Aaron Enigma’s music hits)
Next, Team Motor-Colt member Head Detective Aaron Enigma!
(The Southwest Connection’s music starts, as both members of the SWC enter, with The Sam in tow)
Next, the final member of Team Motor-Colt, representing The Family, LittleNaitch!
(Tyfo and Naitch exchange a tense handshake, as Naitch joins the rest of his team)
And also representing The Family, Team MiLo Duck member, Tyfo!
(Stryker’s music plays)
Representing Team MiLo Duck, he is one half of Stryker Duck Silence, he is Stryker Dark Silence!
(A lion’s roar sounds over the PA system, as grbjazzman’s music hit’s)
Ladies and gentlemen, representing The Pride, Team MiLo Duck member, grbjazzman!
(The Crusade’s music hit’s)
And, representing Team MiLo Duck, Crusade members Seth Drakin, and THE TANK!!!

Above Average and Tyfo enter the ring, and the bell rings, beginning the first period. After a bit of trash talking, the two lockup. Tyfo takes the early advantage, backing Above up against the cage. Tyfo then takes his time working over the Inter-Forum Champion, using chops and kicks to wear him down. Above Average fights back, hitting a pump kick, followed by a clothesline.

1 minute has expired.

Above continues, applying a shoulder breaker. Tyfo fights his way loose, and hit’s a running bulldog. With the Champion down, Tyfo applies the Sharpshooter. Above Average crawls towards the ropes, even though he knows there are no rope breaks in the match.

2 minutes have expired.

Above Average grasps the bottom rope and begins pulling himself up the side of the cage. As he climbs higher, Tyfo is forced to release the hold, and falls to the mat. Above Average drops down next to him. Both men are down, as both teams look on in concern.

3 minutes have expired.

Tyfo and Above Average both try to get to there feet, with Tyfo getting there first. Above Average quickly gets up as well, and the two begin slugging it out. Tyfo gets the better of the exchange, knocking Above Average against the ropes. Tyfo charges, but the Inter-Forum Champion dodges, and Tyfo runs right into the cage.

1 minute remains in the period.

As Above Average and Tyfo continue to fight back and forth inside the cage, Seth Drakin, wordlifeecw, and a referee gather at the timekeeper’s table. The referee tosses the coin, and we hear Seth shout out “Heads!” As Above Average drops Tyfo with a neck breaker, a buzzer goes off.

Ladies and gentlemen, the first period has ended, and Team Motor-Colt has won the coin toss. The second period begins.

After a brief discussion, LittleNaitch reluctantly enters the match. Tyfo is able to take Above Average down with a suplex, then comes face to face with his tag team partner, LittleNaitch. Naitch and Tyfo engage in a staredown, but then shake hands and smile. Naitch pulls Above Average up and holds him in place. Tyfo prepares to chop Above Average, but Naitch suddenly drops his teammate and chops Tyfo. Naitch and Tyfo begin brawling in the first ring, as Above Average rests in the second ring. On the outside, Stryker is impatiently waiting on the steps for the period to end. In the ring, Tyfo takes the advantage against Naitch, as Above Average rejoins the fight. He delivers a backbreaker to Tyfo, as the buzzer sounds.

Ladies and gentlemen, the second period has ended. The third period begins.

Stryker nearly rips the door off of the cage as he rushes in. Stryker’s first move is a single leg takedown on Above Average, then transitioning into a heel hook. As LittleNaitch charges, Tyfo cuts him off with a clothesline, as Above Average yells out in pain. As Stryker cinches the hold, Tyfo repeatedly stomps Above Average. Naitch stops Tyfo with a chop, and then a hiptoss. As Naitch breaks up Stryker’s submission with a kick to the head, the buzzer sounds.

The third period has ended.

Evil Masked wordlifeecw charges into the cage and takes down both Stryker and Tyfo with clotheslines, before checking on Above Average. Naitch works over Stryker’s leg, but Tyfo is able to break it up. Wordlifeecw quickly grabs Tyfo and tosses him into the second ring, and follows him. In the second ring, wordlifeecw punishes Tyfo with a sideslam, followed by a choke slam. Back in the first ring, Above Average is catching his breath, while Stryker batters Naitch with some MMA elbow strikes. With Naitch reeling, Stryker applies a front facelock, into a springboard DDT. The buzzer sounds.

The fourth period has ended.

The Tank enters the second ring and immediately comes to Tyfo’s aid, laying out the Evil Masked One with a spinebuster. Above Average gets to his feet and dives into the second ring, and begins hammering away on Tank with hard strikes. Meanwhile, in the first ring, Stryker whips Naitch into the corner, and goes for a corner splash, but Naitch moves, causing Stryker to run face first into the side of the cage. Naitch pulls Stryker to the top rope and climbs up with a back suplex from the middle rope. Upon the landing, it’s obvious that Stryker has been busted open. Wordlifeecw tosses Tyfo back into the first ring, as the buzzer goes off.

The fifth period has come to an end.

Cthulhu enters the first ring and nearly takes Tyfo’s head off with a lariat, as Naitch stands up. Cthulhu and wordlifeecw come face to face, before Tank slams both men’s heads together. Above Average comes up behind Tank and locks in a full nelson, as wordlifeecw and Cthulhu do the same to Tyfo and Stryker, respectively. With his opponents restrained, Naitch alternates, chopping all three men. As he goes from Tank to Stryker, all three of them lift there legs up and simultaneously kick Naitch away, then finish by flipping over and hitting reverse DDTs on their opponents. The buzzer sounds.

The sixth period has come to an end.

Grbjazzman enters the first ring and goes right after Cthulhu. Jazzman hit’s a barrage of punches, before hitting a butterfly suplex. Meanwhile, in ring two, Above Average and LittleNaitch have cornered Tank and hoist him up on the cage. As they go for a double brain buster, Tyfo and Stryker, having temporarily dispatched wordlifeecw, rush to Tank’s rescue. Tyfo tries to pull Naitch and Above Average down, but get’s kicked away. Tyfo and Stryker double dropkick Above and Naitch, crotching them on the ropes. As they hoist them up on their shoulders, Tank comes off the side of the cage with a double clothesline, felling both men. Wordlifeecw is up and goes after Tank, hitting a sidewalk slam, as the buzzer goes off.

The seventh period has ended.

Aaron Enigma enters as the last member of Team Motor-Colt. Enigma rushes into the first ring, and nails Jazzman with a diving lariat. Tyfo and Stryker rush over to help, but Enigma lays them out with a pair of of dropkicks. Back in ring 2, Above Average and LittleNaitch are trying to get to their feet, as wordlifeecw and Tank slug it out. In the first ring, Cthulhu and Enigma work over Jazzman and Tyfo, while Stryker lays in the corner, disoriented from losing so much blood. Enigma goes for the Brilliant Deduction on Tyfo, who counters it into a Texas Cloverleaf, but Cthulhu breaks it up and tries for the Death Magnetic, only to be met by a kick from Jazzman, who sets up Takin’ The A Train. Naitch pulls Jazzman down into the Figure Four, but Tank traps him in the Kata-hajime. Wordlifeecw stops it and picks up Tank for the Journey to Hell, but Tank counters with a head scissors, only to be met by Above Average’s Superkick. The buzzer sounds, and Seth dives into the ring.

Ladies and gentlemen, eighth period has ended. The Match Beyond begins!

Seth and Above Average duke it out. Seth whips Above into the ropes, but Above ducks the clothesline, and returns off the other side with a leg lariat. Tyfo charges, but AA hit’s another leg lariat. Jazzman tries coming off the top rope, but AA hits another leg lariat, followed by one to Tank. As Above Average soaks in the crowd’s applause, Stryker catches him from behind with the Cyclone Cutter. Stryker collapses in a heap, as Tyfo locks Above in the Cloverleaf. Above Average is about to tap, when Naitch pulls his partner off and locks in the Figure Four. Jazzman breaks it up with a diving leg drop, but wordlifeecw goozles Jazzman. As he brings him up for the Chokeslam, Tank low blows the Evil One, only for Cthulhu to catch him with a piledriver. Seth clotheslines Cthulhu and hit’s the Tale’s End. Enigma comes up behind Seth and applies the Extreme Interrogation! Seth screams in pain as Enigma wrenches him back. Seth goes to tap out, when Enigma suddenly releases the hold.

Stryker has Enigma in the Sleeper! Enigma struggles, but Stryker has cinched in, and Enigma quickly fades. The ref checks the Enigma’s arm, once, and it drops! Twice, and it drops! Three times… Enigma is out!

Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of this match, Seth Drakin, The Tank, Tyfo, grbjazzman, and Stryker, TEAM MILO DUCK!!!

As Stryker collapses from exhaustion, the rest of his team helps him up and hoists him up on their shoulders. Ernest Goes To Wargames ends with Team MiLo celebrating in ring one, as the defeated Team Motor-Colt lays beaten in ring two.

Sunday Night Heatz!!1 - February 22, 2009

Sunday Night Heatz!!1
2/22/09

*Stock footage of a Nuclear Bomb detonating is played with the words "Sunday Night Heatz!!1" is shown. The camera then pans out to the Parts Unknown Arena's ringside announcer booth where the commentators of the evening are seated*

The Sam: Hello Humanoids and welcome to the Championship edition of Sunday Night Heatz, I am the "Manager of Champions" and "2006 Time Magazine Person of the Year" The Sam.

Amigo: And I am former World Champion, John S. Amigo. And welcome again fans, to Sunday Night Heatz. We got a big night, don't we Sam?

The Sam: You better believe it Doctor, every match tonight is a Title Match. Tonight we will see the greatest - wait scratch that - the GREATEST TAG TEAM IN HISTORY! The Southwest Connection take on The Pride for the WWCF Tag Team titles, and in our Main Event we have the WWCF Inter-Forum Champion Above Average defending his title against the Dark One, Legion. But first in our opening match we have the WWCF Hardcore Champion, General of the Monkey Army, taking on the Evil Masked Wordlifeecw.
What do you think of that Doc?

Amigo: My bladder explodes with happiness. And now, our first match of the night: Evil Masked Wordlifeecw versus The General of the Monkey Army for the WWCF Hardcore title.

The Sam: I know more than anyone the kind of danger that Evil Mask can bring, and so that is why I believe Evil Mask may walk out tonight as the winner. What about you Doc, who do you pick?

Amigo: Ah, but The General is Champion for a reason. He is seasoned in Hardcore wrestling. Between his resourcefulness, and Wordlife's brutality, it should be interesting.


WWCF Hardcore Championship: Evil Masked wordlifeecw V. The General of the Monkey Army [c]

Michael Muffer: Ladies and gentlemen, our first match of the evening is set for one fall, and it is for the WWCF Hardcore Championship!
(The arena goes black, as Evil Masked wordlifeecw’s music hits)
Introducing first, from Parts Unknown, Massachusetts, he weighs in at 320 pounds, and he is the challenger. Ladies and gentlemen, Evil Masked wordlifeecw!
(wordlifeecw enters the ring and sets off his pyro, bringing the lights back up)

(The General’s music hits, as the General makes his way out, accompanied by his pet monkey)
And the opponent, from Lansing, Michigan, weighing in at 225 pound, he is the WWCF Hardcore Champion, The General of the Monkey Army!

Wordlifeecw and The General get up in each other’s faces, as the referee calls for the opening bell. The General challenges wordlifeecw to a test of strength. They lock up, with wordlifeecw winning the exchange. Wordlifeecw whips the General into the ropes, and catches him on the rebound with a scoop slam. Cover, 1. 2. Kick out. Wordlifeecw tosses the General to the outside, then leaves the ring as well. The Evil Masked One reaches under the ring and pulls out a cookie sheet, a trash can, and a bag of tumbtacks, which he tosses into the ring. He grabs the General and whips into the crowd control barrier. As the Evil One charges, however, the General moves out of the way, and wordlifeecw goes flying over the barrier and into the crowd. The General follows him, and the fight truly begins. The General and wordlifeecw brawl in the crowd, giving the fans an up close and personal view of the action. The General makes use of his surroundings, asking fans to give him their chairs, which he uses to try and cave in wordlifeecw’s head. The General and the Evil Masked One brawl their way to back of the arena, where the General throws the Evil One into the backboard. The General climbs a set of steps up to the “crow’s nest” and dives off onto his challenger, knocking the Evil Masked One to the floor. Cover, 1. 2. Kick out. The General picks up a nearby shovel and prepares to deliver a crushing blow. The Evil One gets up, but as the General swings, wordlifeecw ducks, and the General ends up hitting the backboard instead. Wordlifeecw grabs the General by the throat and tosses him against the backboard, and follows up with a running splash. The General falls to the ground face first, and wordlifeecw rolls him over and makes the cover. 1. 2. Kick out.

Evil Masked wordlifeecw grabs the General by the back of the neck and starts leading him back to the ring. As they approach the crowd barrier, The General sucker punches wordlifeecw and whips him back over the barrier. The General follows him over, and grabs a chair from ringside. The General smashes wordlifeecw with the chair and rolls him into the ring. The General follows him back in and grabs the trashcan that wordlifeecw brought in earlier. The General turns the trashcan upside down, and various weapons and pieces of garbage fall out. He hits wordlifeew in the head with the trashcan, then picks up a picture frame that fell out of the trashcan. He puts around wordlifeecw’s head, then stomps him. Another cover only yields a 3-count, however. The General, getting frustrated by his inability to put the Evil One away, picks up the bag of thumbtacks, and empties it in the middle of the ring. He whips wordlifeecw into the ropes and catches him with a spine buster, RIGHT ON THE THUMBTACKS!!! Cover, 1! 2! NO!!! KICK OUT!!! The General can’t believe it! The General stomps wordlifeecw and goes for another cover. 1! 2! NO!!! wordlifeecw throws the General right off of him! The General grabs the cookie sheet and hits wordlifeecw with it. Cover, 1! 2! NO!!!! The General stares in horror as the Evil One sits up! The General throws a big right hand(The Monkey Paw) but wordlifeecw catches the punch and bends the General’s hand back. Wordlifeecw whips the General into the ropes and catches him with a big boot, knocking the General out of the ring. Wordlifecw rolls to the floor and tosses the General back in the ring. He picks up the General and delivers a brutal Journey to Hell on the thumbtacks! 1! 2! 3!

Muffer: Here is your winner, and the NEW WWCF Hardcore Champion, EVIL MASKED WORDLIFEECW!!!

The referee hands wordlifeecw the belt, as the General is helped to the back. The Evil Masked One holds the belt up high, as his pyro goes off, with the fans applauding both men for there tremendous efforts.


The Sam: If you ever wanted to know what a Pier 6 Brawl is, that match is your answer.

Amigo: I think a stray tooth from one of our competitors is right next to your hand, Sam. And now, our second match: Reigning champions The Pride going up against The Southwest Connection in a WWCF Tag Team title match. I know who you are rooting for, so let's go straight to it.


WWCF World Tag Team Championship: The Southwest Connection(LittleNaitch and Tyfo) V. The Pride(M.O.P. and Metylerca) [c]

Muffler – The following contest is set for 1 fall and it is for the WWCF Tag Team championships.
(SWC theme music plays)
Making their way to the ring, representing The Family, accompanied by their manager The Sam09. They are Tyfo and Littlenaitch, THE SOUTHWEST CONNECTION!
(SWC march their way down to the ring following The Sam.)
And their opponents.
(Pride theme plays)
At a total combined weight of 462 lbs. Representing The Pride. They are the WWCF Tag Team Champions, METYLERCA AND M.O.P
(Metylerca and M.O.P. make their way to ring acknowledging the fans along the way. They get in the ring and hand their titles over to the referee who holds the titles above his head)
Bell Rings
Littlenaitch and M.O.P. start off. Both competitors circle the ring a couple of times before going for a collared elbow tie up. M.O.P. Pushes Littlenaitch into the corner turnbuckle. The referee begins a 5 count. M.O.P. Lets go and stands back.
Once again, Naitch and M.O.P. circle the ring a few more times before once again going for another collared elbow tie up. This time Naitch pushes M.O.P. into the corner turnbuckle. The referee begins a 5 count. Naitch lets go at 4 and steps back. The fans approve with claps for both teams.
Naitch and M.O.P. circle the ring a couple of time before Naitch tags in Tyfo. Tyfo steps into the ring before charging towards M.O.P. with a Lariat. M.O.P. Ducks the Lariat and lays some Knife Edge Chops on Tyfo’s chest. This sends Tyfo rolling to the outside where he is met by The Sam and Naitch.
M.O.P. Tags in Metylerca who runs the ropes before going for a Suicide Plancha, which sends all 3 members of The Family to the ground along with Metylerca. The fans begin chanting “Holy S***”.
Metylerca manages to get to his feet and rolls in Tyfo before going for a 3 count.
1
2
Tyfo kicks out at 2.
Metylerca picks up Tyfo but Tyfo hits Metylerca with a massive forearm shot. Tyfo then Irish whips Metylerca and hits Metylerca with a Lariat. Tyfo goes for a pinfall.
1
2
2 count
Tyfo drags Metylerca over to the Family’s corner where Tyfo tags in Naitch who delivers a Knee Drop to Metylerca’s face. Naitch starts stomping away at Metylerca who picks himself up by the ropes. Naitch continues stomping away until Metylerca grabs Naitch’s boot. Naitch begins pleading and as he does so Tyfo runs across the apron and distracts Metylerca. M.O.P. Tries to enter the ring to save his partner but the referee tells him to get back. Meanwhile the Southwest Connection are beating up Metylerca who is completely helpless. Naitch then drags Metylerca to the centre of the ring, lets out a primal “WOOO!” before locking in a Figure 4 Leg Lock. Metylerca tries to drag himself towards the ropes but can’t quite reach it. Metylerca then uses his strength plus momentum to flip Naitch over to reverse the hold. Metylerca does so which forces Naitch to let go of the hold.
Both Naitch and Metylerca try to tag in their partners but Tyfo manages to get in the ring and attacks Metylerca. The referee sends him back to his corner but as he does so Metylerca tags in M.O.P however since the referee didn’t see the tag Metylerca is still the legal man. Tyfo then tags himself in and lifts up Metylerca.

The referee is trying to calm down M.O.P. but as he does so The Sam grabs a tag title. Metylerca kicks back Tyfo before heading off the ropes. As he does so Naitch grabs Metylerca in a double chicken wing as The Sam slides the Tag Title towards Tyfo. The referee is still distracted with M.O.P.
Tyfo reels up to hit a defenceless Metylerca with the tag title but as he does so Metylerca slips out of the chicken wing and Tyfo accidently wacks Naitch in the head with the title. Tyfo is shocked and Metylerca sneaks up behind Tyfo and delivers the “Ride the Lightnin’”, The crowd erupts as Metylerca goes for a pinfall.
1
2
3
Muffler – The winners of this match, and still WWCF Tag Team Champions. METYLERCA AND M.O.P THE PRIDE!
(The Pride celebrate in the ring as The Sam helps the SWC back into the locker room)

The Sam: *Returns to commentary* DID YOU SEE THAT? THEY CHEATED!

Amigo: I cheated all the time and no one ever complained........ Anyways, onto the main event, the Inter-Forum champion, Above Average, going up against Legion.

The Sam: Let me tell you something, this Above Average, for the past few months he has been on a roll. He has defended his title more than anyone else has defended a title in WWCF history, but in my opinion, that run is coming to an end tonight.
Legion is one bad mother, and I think Above Average is going to have a hard time overcoming the Dark One.

Amigo: Ah, but AA has beaten Legion before, so it could happen again. Now, let's see who wins.


WWCF Inter-Forum Championship: Legion V. Above Average [c]

Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is set for one fall, and it is for the WWCF Inter-Forum Championship!
Introducing first…
(Legion’s music begins playing)
From the darkness within you all, weighing in at 253 pounds, the challenger…(Everyone in the arena looks up, as Legion, wearing a giant pair of bat wings, descends to the ring via zipline)
LEGION!!!
(Legion releases himself from the zipline and raises his arms, causing black flames to shoot from the turnbuckles and the stage)

And his opponent…
(The Prodigy by Poison begins playing)
From Belfast, weighing in at 260 pounds…
(Above Average appears on stage and walks towards the ring, with pyro reigning down behind him)
The WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, ABOVE AVERAGE!!!

Above Average and Legion lockup in the center of the ring. Above Average arm drags Legion and applies an armbar. Legion fights out of it and whips Above Average into the ropes. Above Average comes off the ropes with a short tackle, cutting Legion off at the legs. Above Average rains punches down on Legion, until the referee pulls him off. As Above Average argues with the referee, Legion gets to his feet and surprises the Inter-Forum Champion with a blockbuster. Cover, 1-2-kick out. Legion pulls Above Average off the mat and delivers a shoulder breaker for another 2-count. As Above Average desperately tries to catch his breath, Legion removes one of the turnbuckle covers. Above Average is up and ready for Legion with a sit-out powerbomb, earning a 2-count. The Champion slams Legion to the mat and delivers a Garvin Stomp. Legion kicks out of the pin attempt. Above Average locks in a rear chinlock, but Legion is able to stand up with the Champion on his back. The challenger falls back, slamming Above Average to the mat. Legion makes a cover, but Above Average kicks out.

Legion works over Above Average’s neck, with hammer strikes and pressure points. Above Average tries to fight back, but Legion pokes the Champion in the eyes, and follows up with a DDT for a 2-count. Legion continues to punish his former partner, assaulting him with punches and shoulder strikes. He tosses Above Average into the corner(not the one with the exposed turnbuckle) and delivers a huge splash in the corner, followed by another near fall. Legion throws Above Average into the ropes and hit’s a backbody drop on the Champion. Legion follows up with an over-the-shoulder reverse piledriver, gaining another 2-count. Above Average struggles to his feet, only for Legion to knock him right back down again with a single punch. Legion then pulls Above Average to his feet and locks in the Arms of Morpheus. Above Average fights and struggles, desperately trying to break the hold, but Legion has it locked in right in the center of the ring. The referee checks on Above Average. He lifts the arm once, and it falls. Twice and it drops again. The third time, the arm doesn’t drop. Above Average breaks out of the hold and delivers a big running leg lariat, but only gets a 2-count.

Above Average pulls Legion up, but the challenger catches him off guard with a spinning neck breaker. Legion then signals that it’s time to finish this. Legion picks up the Champion on his shoulder and carries him over the exposed turnbuckle. As he goes for a stun gun, Above Average slides out and rams Legion into the corner. Dazed, Legion turns around and walks right into the Superkick. 1-2-3.

Here is your winner, and STILL WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, ABOVE AVERAGE!!!

As Legion returns to locker room, defeated, Above Average celebrates as the fans applaud.


Amigo: And there you have it, Above Average has proven who is the best.

The Sam: You have to wonder why a match of that caliber is not on the PPV.

Amigo: Because we have to give the viewers a taste of the best once in a while. And with that, our time is up. On behalf of everybody in the WWCF, I'm Dr. John S. Amigo, M.D.

The Sam: And I'm the "Manager of Champions" The Sam, reminding you to tune in tomorrow night for the WWCF PPV "Earnest Goes To Wargames" and tune in next week for more exciting WWCF action, right here on Sunday Night Heatz!

Monday Niteraw - February 16, 2009

Monday Niteraw
February 16th, 2009

Pick Your Poison Hardcore Match: Evil Masked wordlifeecw V. Whitey Fats

Wordlifeecw comes to the ring first. The General comes up on the video screen and announces his chosen opponent.

Whitey Fats makes his way to the ring, and the match begins. Wordlifeecw hit’s a throat thrust to Whitey, followed by a scoop slam. Whitey rolls to the outside, but the Evil One follows him. Whitey fires off some punches, but the monster doesn’t go down. Wordlifeecw whips Whitey into the steel steps, but Whitey stops himself, and spins around and jabs his thumb in wordlifeecw’s eye. Whitey slams wordlifeecw’s head into the steps, then grabs a chair from ringside. Whitey cracks wordlifeecw in the head with the chair, knocking the big man to one knee. A second hit knocks him to the floor. Whitey picks up the steel steps and drops them across wordlifeecw’s sternum. Whitey then reaches under the ring and pulls out a car tire. He wraps the tire across wordlifeecw’s waist and drops a knee across the big man’s throat. Whitey makes the cover. 1. 2. Kickout.

Whitey pulls wordlifeecw up and tosses him back in the ring. He grabs the chair and rolls back in as well. Whitey puts the chair across wordlifeecw’s throat and ascends to the top rope. As he jumps, wordlifeecw sits up, narrowly avoiding the stomp. As Whitey turns around, wordlifeecw is waiting and goozles him. Whitey kicks wordlifeecw in the gut, causing him to release him. Whitey hit’s the Burning Hammer, but only gets a 2-count. Whitey picks up the chair and prepare for another blow, but wordlifeecw ducks it, and boots the chair back in Whitey’s face. Wordlifeecw grabs Whitey and hit’s the chokeslam, followed by the Journey to Hell, and makes the cover. 1. 2. 3.

Here is your winner, Evil Masked wordlifeecw!



Pick Your Poison Extreme Rules Match: The General of the Monkey Army V. Cthulhu

The General makes his way to the ring, armed with a shopping cart full of weapons. Cthulhu walks out, armed with a guitar, wrapped in barbed wire. The match starts with The General clotheslining Cthulhu to the mat. He immediately grabs a lead pipe and cracks Cthulhu in the head with it. A cover only earns him a 1-count, however. Cthulhu gets to his feet, only to be met with a chair to the face. Another cover, another 1-count. Cthulhu gets up and grabs his guitar. The General pulls out a baseball bat to defend himself with. Both swing at the same time, and the weapons collide, with only the bat breaking. Cthulhu swings again with the guitar, but The General ducks. Cthulhu tries to bring the guitar down across The General’s head, but The General lowblows him.

Cthulhu goes down, and The General follows up with a fist drop, and then a stomp. The General makes the cover, but Cthulhu kicks out at 2. The General grabs the guitar and pulls some of the barbed wire off of it, and wraps it around his fist. The General mounts Cthulhu and hammers away with punches with the barbed wire wrapped fist. Another cover, but only 2. The General reaches into the shopping cart and pulls out a trashcan. As he’s doing this, Cthulhu rolls to the floor. The General follows, but Cthulhu is able to kick the trashcan back into The General’s face Cthulhu throws The General back in the ring, then grabs a table.

Cthulhu slides the table into the ring. The General meets him with a chairshot, which sends Cthulhu to the mat. The General sets up the table, but doesn’t see Cthulhu reaching into his tights and pulling out his chain. The General grabs Cthulhu, but gets met by a fist wrapped with a chain. Cthulhu quickly delivers the Death Magnetic through the table, and gets the pin. 1-2-3.

Here is your winner, Cthulhu!



*backstage*
J. Fish - Hello, WWCF's newest announcer Jerry Fish here backstage. In just a few moments we will see Tromboneman, from the Family, take on Jazzman, from the Pride. If we could get a word with either competitor I'm sure...wait, here comes Tromboneman now!
(Tromboneman walks past as Jerry holds a microphone towards him, Tromboneman just keeps walking. Jerry holds a microphone up to The Sam who promptly stops)
Jerry - Mr. The Sam, may I have a word with you?
The Sam - I'll sign your autograph after the show.
[color=Yellow]Jerry - Ha ha, no, I'm WWCF's new announcer, Jerry Fish.
The Sam - Oh......then I'll sign your autograph after the show.
[color=Yellow]Jerry - I'm not looking for an autograph but a statement on what do you think of tonight’s match.
The Sam - Well let me just say that if Jazzman wants to qualify for the Tromboneweight championship, there is only one way, and that is to be the correct weight limit, 240 pounds. And according to the WWCF website, you Mr. Jazzman weigh in at 206 pounds. So Jazzman, if you want a run for the title, go ahead, but my advice is do a little less running and a little more eating Skinny. And if Milo Duck is watching, I got 2 championship material left in my Family, I hope you make the right choice tonight Duckman.
Jerry - Thank you for your time, back to you at ringside.



Grbjazzman V. TromboneMan w/ The Sam09

Muffer – The following contest is set for one fall
(In The Mood – Glenn Miller)
Making his way to the ring first, representing The Family, accompanied by his manager, The Sam09. He is the Tromboneweight champion and WWCF Money in the Bank winner, TROMBONEMAN!
(Tromboneman makes his way down to the ring with The Sam in tow; The Sam is carrying The MitB briefcase in one hand and a Trombone in the other. Tromboneman is wearing the Tromboneweight title)
and his opponent;
(Sing Sang Sung – Gordon Goodwin)
From Fulton, New York, weighing in at 206 pounds. Representing The Pride, GRBJAZZMAN!
(Jazzman makes his way to the ring, but not before handing his Fedora to a young boy sitting in the front row)
Bell Rings.
Jazzman taunts the crowd to which they cheer. Tromboneman taunts the crowd and they boo. Jazzman taunts the crowd again and again the cheer. Tromboneman taunts the crowd and they boo and a “Platypus” chant begins at The Sam. Jazzman jumps to the second rope and taunts the crowd but as he does so Tromboneman attacks Jazzman with a big double axe handle to the back. Tromboneman pulls Jazzman down from the second turnbuckle and starts throwing punches. Jazzman ducks a punch though and throws a big haymaker, which sends Tromboneman to the outside of the ring.
Tromboneman stays on the outside for an 8 count catching his breath before getting back in the ring.
Tromboneman and Jazzman go for a collared elbow tie up, Tromboneman lowers himself and hits an Arm drag on Jazzman, but Jazzman immediately gets up and hits a dropkick, which sends Tromboneman to the canvas. Jazzman goes for a pin.
1
2
2 count.
Jazzman tries to lift up Tromboneman, Tromboneman hits a jawbreaker though which sends Jazzman reeling. Tromboneman then hits a Snap Suplex on Jazzman. Tromboneman begins stomping on Jazzman. Tromboneman bounces off the ropes but Jazzman lifted his feet , which caused Tromboneman to be Monkey flipped. Jazzman then gets up and bounces off the ropes him. But The Sam grabbed his ankle, which tripped Jazzman.
The referee see’s this, climbs out the ring and tells The Sam that he is barred from ringside. The Sam starts complaining but Ralphus and security escort him back to the locker room.
Tromboneman tries to persuade the referee to reverse his decision but as he does Jazzman hits a Reverse Body slam on Tromboneman.

Jazzman taunts the crowd to show he is going to hit the “Taking’ The A Train”. As Jazzman lifts up Tromboneman, Tromboneman manages to slip past Jazzman and lock in a sleeper. Jazzman in an act of desperation runs towards the ropes, bounces off the second turnbuckle and rolls Tromboneman into a Pin, Bret Hart style.
1
2
3
The winner of the match, GRBJAZZMAN!!!

As Tromboneman storms off, Jazzman begins celebrating in the ring.
Suddenly, KGX jumps the guardrail , sneaks up on Jazzman and hits him with the “Emerald Fusion”. The referee and security try to hold KGX but KGX manages to gets past them and continues to attack Jazzman. The Pride runs in to save Jazzman but KGX has already run off before they can get their revenge.
KGX is shown running through the crowd turning back to laugh at The Pride who look on in anger towards KGX.



Stevierichardsfan babyface w/ Krazy E-Man V. “Evil La Parka” w/ The Tank

*Leave The Memories Alone sounds out over the PA and Stevie drifts slowly out onto the stage*

Michael Muffer: Our next match is scheduled for ONE fall! Being accompanied to the ring by his tag team partner Krazy E-Man, from Badstreet, USA, weighing in at TWOOO HUNDRED and TWENTY FIVE POUUUUNDS, he is one half of the WARGAME WARRIOOOOORS, STEVIERICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS BAAAAAAAABYYYYYYYYYYYFAAAAAAAAACE FAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

*Stevie high fives fans on a slowish wak to the ring, focusing dead ahead. He rolls in as Krazy E-Man walks up the steps, and the pair talk amongst themselves in the ring. The La Parka theme hits and the dark masked figure appears on the stage, mocking the dance of his famous namesake*

Michael Muffer: And his opponent, accompanied to the ring by The Tank, from Mexico City, Mexico, he also weighs in at TWOOO HUNDRED, T-WENTY FIVE POOOOOOOOUNDS, 'EVIIIIIIIIL' LA PARRRRKAAAAA!

*Parka dances his way down to the ring, chair in hand. He smashes it against the apron, then springs up onto it, and over the ropes in one movement, he dances, not taking his eyes of Stevie. The Tank stalks around ringside as Krazy steps out.*

The bell rings as ELP runs off the ropes and slides to his knees, trying to draw Stevie onto him. Krazy E-Man takes the opportunity to get behind ELP and makes a sneaky pull at his foot. ELP snaps round and flashes a hard kick at KEM, but that gives Stevie the opening to rush him from behind and sweep his standing leg out. ELP struggles, but Stevie has the weight on and starts wrenching and pulling away at the knee. ELP reaches for the ropes, but Stevie pulls him back in and lifts the left leg up high, driving the knee back down into the canvas, before working the stomps into the back of the knee. ELP wriggles his right leg underneath him and powers up on that one foot, Stevie tries to drag him off balance pulling on the left leg again, but ELP swings a back heel kick at Stevie who ducks under the foot, but he fires straight back up and catches Stevie with the Enzuigiri sending him reeling, as ELP backs up into the corner, guarding his leg.

Stevie is back to his knees talking to KEM through the ropes, ELP seizes the opportunity and charges him from behind hitting a spinning back kick, sending Stevie through the middle rope to the outside, but the charge hurt ELP too, and he clutches at his leg. KEM motions at ELP, but Tank charges him with a Polish Hammer from behind, and stomps away. ELP is up and across the ring, running back, wincing on the one leg, and..yes...SPRINGBOARD SENTON TO THE OUTSIDE, LANDING RIGHT ON STEVIE'S MIDRIFF.

ELP catches his breath and is up and dancing. He rolls Stevie back into the ring...

ELP drags Stevie to his feet, scoops him up and hangs him on the tree of woe on the second rope, on the outside of the turnbuckle. ELP grabs his chair and goes for a wild swing, but the referee is there to pull it out of his grip. He continues to remonstrate with ELP, but while he's distracted, Tank grabs Stevie with the double underhook, and PULLS HIM OFF THE TURNBUCKLE FOR THE DOUBLE UNDERHOOK POWERBOMB TO THE FLOOR. Stevie was folded over in two with that. KEM is back up and TAKES TANK DOWN WITH A BRUTAL SPEAR. ELP pushes past the ref and drags Stevie to his feet, rolling him into the ring, sliding in after him. He drags Stevie to his feet and whips him into the ropes, and hits the dropkick on him. ELP up top now, and HE COMES OFF WITH THE X-RAY!! 1-2 NO! STEVIE KICKS OUT!! ELP is on his knees, pounding his own head out of frustration. KEM is up on the apron, but the referee stops him from entering the ring. ELP grabs his chair, and smashes it down on Stevie's back, throwing it to the outside. The referee turns but not quickly enough, and sees ELP dragging the beaten Stevie to the centre of the ring. TEQUILA SUNRISE LOCKED IN!!! Stevie has nowhere to go and taps!!

Michael Muffer: Here is your winner, EEEEEEEEVIL LA PAAAAAARKAAAAAAAA!!

Evil La Parka dances in the ring, miming removing his mask, taunting the Warriors as Krazy E-Man helps Stevie to the back.



Ladies and gentlemen, I have been asked to make the following announcement. MiLo Duck has selected his team for Ernest Goes To Wargames! His team will consist of Stryker Dark Silence, Seth Drakin, Tyfo, The Tank, and grbjazzman!



Viva Los Bio Dome and Brahma Bull V. The Non-American Heroes

The Non-American Heroes make their way to the ring, as the crowd boos profusely. Viva Los Bio Dome and Brahma Bull enter next, to the audience’s applause.

Square and Brahma start the match. They lock up, and right away, Bull tries to bite Square, but Square pulls away. Bull charges with a head butt, but Square side steps him, causing Bull to go through the ropes, and out of the ring. Bull reenters the ring, where Square meets him with a kick to gut, followed by a spine buster. Starshine tags in. Starshine slams Bull and drops a leg across his throat. He makes the cover. 1. 2. Kickout. Bull tries to mount a comeback, hitting a spear, but as he goes for a body slam, Starshine connects with a low blow. Square tags back in and delivers a face buster to Brahma Bull. Another cover. 1. 2. Kickout.

Square shoots Brahma into the ropes, but Brahma comes back with a shoulder tackle. Brahma and Square both crawl towards their corners, looking for a tag. Square gets there first, and tags Starshine. Brahma is just about to tag Bio Dome, but Starshine knocks Bio Dome off the apron, and pulls Brahma over to the NAH’s corner. Starshine goes to the second rope and delivers an elbow drop. Cover, and 1. 2. Kickout. Square tags back in and they go for a boomerang lariat, but Brahma ducks out of the way, causing the Heroes to collide. Brahma dives towards his corner and tags in Bio Dome!

Bio Dome charges into the ring and peppers both Heroes with lefts and rights, as well a big Purple Sticky Punch to each man. Bio Dome whips Square into the ropes and comes off the rebound with a back body drop. Cover. 1! 2! NO, Starshine breaks up the pin! Bio Dome picks up Starshine and tosses him to the outside, before turning back to Square. Square surprises Bio Dome with a poke to the eyes, followed by the L7. Cover, 1! 2! And 3! as Starshine pulls Brahma Bull to the floor.

Here are your winners, Starshine and Square, The Non-American Heroes!

As Brahma tends to Bio Dome, Square and Starshine walk back up the ramp, taunting the crowd the entire time.



Stryker Dark Silence V. TTS

Michael Muffer: The following match is the first of Commisioner Amigo's challenges for Stryker Dark Silence after the request laid down by Stryker after last week's exhibition. It will be fought one fall to a finish, and there is no time limit!

*The bagpipes and drums roll out, and Stryker appears on the ramp. He has a defiant look on his face as he walks to the ring, unflinching, staring*

Michael Muffer: Approaching the ring, accompanied by the World Heavyweight Champion Milo Duck, emerging from the depths of his soul, he weighs in tonight at two hundred and thirty six pounds. He is STRRRRRRRRRRRRRRYKER DARK SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILENCE!!

*Stryker grabs a mic as he hops up knee first onto the apron, wipes his feet, and steps through the ropes*

A number of months ago now, D-Day Dave saw the potential in the market for a new kind of wrestling company. He had the guile and the vision and the determination to make that happen. Part of his vision, part of what he saw, was the need for strong cornerstones. Reliable people. Talented people. People who could perform and make a difference. People who, at the end of the month would make that number on the bottom line bigger than it would have been without them. There were only two people who filled that criteria, and that was the two men who created the body known as StrykerDuckSilence. We willingly walked into this federation, not expecting anything out of the ordinary, just that we be treated on our merits, and be rewarded as such. And at first, everything in the garden was rosey. Two time tag team champions, the FIRST! two time tag champions, and Milo, my boy down there, achieved the ultimate goal, the boyhood dream, and became a world champion. But it hasn't all been about the glory. Personal issues arose, cocky, arrogant, impudent little individuals raked up unpleasent items of the past, but because I'm a part of this company, I helped make it what it was, and I knew that it was only right that the company benefit by the airing of that dirty laundry in public. I gave blood, sweat and tears in buckets, and fought, and showed the world that NOBODY!! has more passion for what they do inside this ring than me. I showed why I am the Franchise of this company, and why without me it wouldn't be as successful as it has been.

So then I feel like I've done my hard yards, that it's time for me to get my rewards as a performer, and request a title shot. I didn't demand a main event, I didn't demand a special place, I asked for what should only be a rightful reward for a Franchise player, but I got rejected. So I came out here last week and wrestled for an hour with potentially no personal gain. I put on one of the best matches this company has ever seen. Let's remember that too, I've been part of some of the biggest matches in this companies short history.

So then the time comes for my reward, and what happens? Some bitter ex-wrestler in a suit tries to screw with my head, and spits on everything I've done for this company.

LET ME MAKE THIS CLEAR AMIGO...WHETHER I WIN, OR WHETHER I LOSE, I WILL BLOW YOUR HAIR BACK, AND I WILL IMPRESS THE BOARD, THE OWNERS, THE FANS UNTIL YOU REALISE WHAT THE FRANCHISE MEANS TO THIS COMPANY. I WILL GET MY CHANCE AT A TITLE THAT I WANT, AND I WILL STRYKE YOU OUT!

Tonight a wrestle a joke of a man, but TTS I see through your guise, and I see a man with skill who could on his night pin me to the mat, but you will never be as passionate as me about this, and after this match, just like Motor-Colt, the KING of Wrestlecrap, you'll be unable to refuse shaking my hand, and another person will see what Stryker is about and what I deserve.

*Stryker drops the mic outside the ring and rolls out, taking off his jacket and his kilt as Down On Me plays, and TTS walks out ignoring the hands of the fans*

Michael Muffer: And his opponent, chosen by Commisioner AMIIIGO!! From Davie, Florida, weighing in at two hundred and NINETY POUNDS! T!!!T!!!SSSSSSS!!!

The bell rings, and Stryker steps forward and offers his hand to TTS, who accepts and offers a lazy shake.

The pair circle and then charge with a collar and elbow tie up. TTS' weight advantage factors in and he pushes Stryker back into a corner. The referee starts the 5 count and a clean break at 3 from TTS. Stryker steps out of the corner and raises his right hand for a test of strength, not wanting to be psyched out by the potential domination. TTS accepts and they link both hands and push hard against each other. TTS again gets advantage and pushes Stryker to his knees. He manages to force his way back up to his feet, but TTS sweeps over with the Arm Ringer. Stryker calls out in pain, slapping at his shoulder to try and relieve the pressure, TTS is leaning in, but not really cranking it up, allowing Stryker to twist out and hits a knife edge chop to TTS, raising WOOs from the crowd. TTS leans into the wringer, but Stryker continues to fight back with sharp chops to the chest. TTS brings a clubbing blow down on Stryker's stretched shoulder, sending Stryker to a knee, but again he comes back with a chop. They exchange those blows, bringing an OHHHHH, WOOOOOOOO, OHHHHHH, WOOOOOOOO, OHHHHH, WOOOOOO chant from the crowd. Stryker wheels off 3 sharp Kobashi style chops on TTS to break the hold and grabs a ringer of his own, cranking all his weight into it. TTS shouts out at the stretch on his shoulder until he can't stand it anymore, he wheels round sharply with a DISCUS CLOTHESLINE, WIPING STRYKER OUT TO THE FLOOR.

TTS rolls his shoulder, trying to ease the hyper extension of the muscles. Stryker starts to stir, so TTS starts laying in with the boots, pounding away a mudhole. He grabs Stryker and sits him up, then runs, rebounds off the ropes and comes back with a LOW LEG LARIAT, FLATTENING STRYKER AGAIN!!

TTS takes it down a level and cranks in a hard Chinlock, as Stryker struggles groggily for breath. TTS pushes his knee hard in between Stryker's shoulder blades, but Stryker throws a hard elbow into the reddened chest of TTS, loosening the grip, allowing Stryker to roll free and to the outside to catch his breath.

TTS marauds over and looms over Stryker as he staggers around the outside of the ring. Stryker grabs at the leg of TTS, and pulls him down, smashing his knee against the ring post repeatedly, using ring savvy to counter TTS' advantage. He's going for it, YES! FIGURE 4 AROUND THE RING POST! Stryker throws his weight back into it, sending TTS thrashing around. The ref gets to the outside and demands Stryker break the hold, counting the 5, Stryker letting go at the last minute, but the damage may already be done.

Stryker cautiously slides back in, with TTS still nursing his leg sitting in the corner. Stryker dives in from behind and grinds his forearm into TTS' face. TTS tries to power up, but Stryker jumps to the second rope and comes off with a Mule Stomp to the chest. He drags TTS to the centre of the ring, and slaps on the Sleeper!! TTS again tries to power out, but the hold is on tight. He fights but his face is going red, his lips blue and...yes....he's now slumped. The referee raises his arm once, it drops. Twice, it drops. A third time and it's all over...TTS CLENCHES HIS FIST AND HOLDS IT UP, AVOIDING THE LOSS!! He wraps his free arm around the back of Stryker's head, and pulls him over with a modified snapmare. Still gasping for breath, he goes for the Camel Clutch. Stryker fights the hold, but TTS sits back and wrenches the hold. Stryker stretches and grabs the bottom rope, forcing the break of the hold.

TTS is up to his feet, blowing hard, but with the momentum. He leans back against the ropes, then runs at Stryker and hits the Bulldog. Lateral press, 1-2-NO!

Hammering his fists into the canvas, TTS drags Stryker to his feet and whips him across the ring. He goes for the Back Body Drop, but Stryker rolls over it, lands on his feet runs through to the ropes on the opposite side. He springboards over and catches TTS in a DDT, driving his head into the mat. Stryker up top, and comes off with a big splash onto TTS. He hauls TTS to his feet, and goes for the Cyclone Cutter, but TTS manages to get his feet down. He shoves Stryker off into the ropes and grabs him on the rebound, hoisting him up for the Pile Up, but Stryker himself manages to get his feet down and flings him over with a huge Belly To Belly Suplex. He goes for the cover 1-2-NO!!. Again with a hook of the leg 1-2-NO!!. Stryker stands and holds his throat for a second...BEFORE SPITTING THE GREEN MIST INTO TTS' EYES. SEATED FULL NELSON!! AND TTS TAPS! TTS TAPS OUT!!

Michael Muffer: HERE IS YOUR WINNER, STRRRRRRRRRYKER DARK SIIIIIIIIIIILENCE!!

Stryker immediately grabs his jacket from the outside and uses it to wipe TTS eyes clear. Helping his opponent to his feet, the pair face off for a minute, TTS pushes his forehead hard into Stryker's nose to nose, before he starts to laugh. He steps back, rubbing his eyes still. He raises Stryker's arm, and Stryker reciprocates. The two hug, and TTS drops out of the ring.

*Stryker breathing heavily* YOU KNOW IT AMIGO. YOU KNOW I'LL PROVE IT. GIVE ME WHAT I WANT, OR SET ME ANOTHER CHALLENGE! I! WILL! STRYKE! YOU! OUT!



*Aaron sits in a dark room, contemplating his upcoming match*

Tonight I have the chance to get into the Wargames match. It will not be an easy task though. Both of my opponents are definitely veterans, especially when compared to me. Koda and I had an amazing House of Fun match a few weeks ago. He is not someone to be taken lightly. I wonder what he will do now that Viva Los Bio Dome has offered him a title shot at the pay-per-view though.

Metylerca I have never faced before, but he won't be easy just because he usually wrestles on a team. He is a member of The Pride, one half of the tag-team champions. He is possibly more dangerous than Koda, and I, for one, do not wish to Ride the Lightning ever.

A lot is riding on this match for me. I want to gain my first victory. I want to compete in the Wargames match. I want people to see that I am not all talk.

I'm Aaron Enigma, and tonight...I'm on the case.



Koda V. Aaron Enigma V. Metylerca

The match starts with a staredown between the three. Aaron walks up to Koda and holds out his hand. Koda looks confused for a second then shakes Aaron's hand. Aaron then turns to Metylerca and does the same, and they shake hands. The audience claps at the display of respect.

Koda runs at Aaron and locks up with him. Aaron manages to twist into a chinlock, but Koda slips out and trips Aaron to the ground. Metylerca sees an opening and sweeps the leg of Koda knocking him down as well. Metylerca applies a neck vice to Koda, but it is broken up by a forearm from Aaron, who then irish whips Metylerca off the ropes. He catches Metylerca on the rebound and drives him down with a reverse STO. Aaron tries to lock in Extreme Interrogation but Koda drops an elbow and stops it before it happens.

Koda picks Aaron up and starts laying in a series of right hands. Koda then kicks Aaron in the midsection and attempts a DDT. Aaron counters however and elbows Koda in the face. Metylerca comes up and dropkicks Koda into Aaron and both men fall out of the ring. Metylerca waits for them to recovers, bounces off the ropes and suicide planchas both men by running through the ropes.

Metylerca drags Aaron to his feet and throws him back into the ring. He locks in a chinlock intent on wearing Aaron's neck down. Aaron slowly makes his way to his feet and elbows Metylerca in the ribs, breaking the hold. Aaron runs and bounces off the ropes but gets clotheslined by Metylerca. Koda sneaks up on Metylerca and hits a clothesline to the back of the head, knocking him down as well. Aaron uses his legs to trip Koda though, and all three men are left lying on the canvas.

Aaron is the first to get up and picks Koda up and throws him into a turnbuckle. He charges at Koda but Koda counters with a kick to the head. Aaron, dazed, walks right into a kick from Metylerca. Metylerca goes for the cover bur Koda breaks it up. Metylerca and Koda trade punches with Metylerca gaining the upper hand until Koda kness him in the midsection and DDTs Metylerca. Koda goes for the pin but it's barely broken up by Aaron, who then locks Koda in the Gorilla Clutch. Koda slowly fights his way to the ropes, forcing Aaron to break the hold.

Aaron breaks the hold only for Koda to knock him out of the ring. Koda picks up Metylerca and tries to hit the Killing Joke only for Metylerca to hit Ride the Lightning instead. Both Metylerca and Koda are lying in the ring, neither able to pin the other. Metylerca slowly crawls over to Koda and drapes his arm over him. Koda manages to break the pin by getting his foot on the bottom rope. Both men struggle to get to their feet. Koda throws Metylerca into the turnbuckle and runs towards him. Aaron leaps into the ring and spear Koda to the ground. Aaron runs at Metylerca only for Metylerca to get out of the way. Aaron rams into the turnbuckle and Metylerca throws him into the opposite one. Metylerca charges at Aaron and leaps to hit a splash. Aaron catches him and runs to the middle of the ring. He STOs Metylerca onto Koda. He pushes Koda out of the ring and picks up Metylerca. He hits the Brilliant Deduction but doesn't release the hold. He stands back up and switches to hit a Reverse STO. Aaron locks in Extreme Interrogation on Metylerca and he taps out.

Here is your winner, Head Detective, Aaron Enigma!

*Motor-Colt leaves the announce desk and shakes Aaron’s hand*

Now... joining this man in my Wargames Team will be... Wordlife, Above Average, LittleNaitch, Cthulhu and Aaron Enigma! Milo, face it, your team doesn't stand a chance... just like you.

Sunday Night Heatz!!1 - February 15, 2009

Sunday Night Heatz!!1
February 15th, 2009

Three Way Dance: Jonathan Michaels V. MolotovMocktail V. KGX

MolotovMocktail is already in the ring, playing air guitar to a lackluster response, he starts to get angry at the fans when the strains of "Original Prankster" emanate from the arena's loudspeakers, Jonathan Michaels emerges from the smoke, a look of determination on his face.

Michael Muffer: Ladies and Gentlemen, the opening contest is the Three Way Dance, in the ring, hailing from Petaluma, California, MolotovMocktail!

Molotov stares daggers at Michaels.

Making his way to the ring, from Hollywood, Jonathan Michaels!

Michaels slides into the ring, returning Molotov's stare, after a moment, Michaels holds out a hand to Molotov as his music stops and is replaced by "Dead and Bloated", signaling the arrival of KGX.

Before Molotov can return Jonathan's gesture, KGX runs down to the ring, climbs in and tackles Michaels as the ref calls for the opening bell.

Molotov pulls KGX off Jonathan and starts peppering him with lefts and rights as Michaels gathers himself in the corner and watches.

KGX kicks Mocktail in the gut and flings him into Michaels in the corner, he then charges headfirst into both of them, Michaels is slumped in the corner and Mocktail is facedown on the mat as KGX taunts the crowd.

KGX pulls Jonathan out of the corner and sets him up for a belly to back suplex, but Michaels headbutts him repeatedly and turns around, hitting KGX with a snap suplex of his own, following it up with a standing moonsault, Michaels pins KGX, but the count is broken up at 1 by Molotov, hitting both with a shooting star press.

Molotov makes his way to the corner, waiting for one of his foes to get up, but gets impatient and rolls Jonathan aside and puts KGX in the Walls of Jericho, but just as KGX is about to tap, Jonathan pops up and hits Molotov with the Fade To Black, allowing KGX to reverse the Walls and get the three count on MolotovMocktail.

MolotovMocktail has been eliminated!

Michaels immediately goes after KGX, spearing him as he stands up, and immediately locks in the Key Grip, but KGX manages to roll out and kick Michaels in the face to escapes the maneuver.

KGX waits for Michaels to stand up and nails him with a Short-Arm Clothesline, KGX climbs to the top rope and signals the end is near, he jumps off the top rope but Jonathan rolls away.

As KGX lies prone, Michaels once again applies the Key Grip, and this time KGX has no choice but to tap out.

Here is your winner, Jonathan Michaels!

After the referee raises his hand, Michaels picks KGX up and hits him with a DDT, Michaels rolls KGX onto his back and places one foot on his chest the same way KGX did last week, he calls for a mic.

"Ladies and gentlemen, once again, here is your winner, Jonathan Michaels."

He waits a moment.

"AND, CUT."



Latino Meat and Madman Szalinski V. Whitey Fat and TTS

Latino Meat and TTS start the match. TTS calls for a test of strength. Meat goes to oblige, but TTS pulls his hand back. As he and Whitey laugh over the trick they pulled, Meat dropkicks TTS into Whitey, knocking Whitey to the floor. Latino Meat picks up TTS and slams him to the mat, then leg drops him and tags Szalinski in. The Madman whips TTS into the ropes and hit’s a shoulder block. As TTS gets to his feet, Szalinski head butts him, sending him stumbling to his corner, where Whitey tags in. Szalinski and Whitey lockup, and Szalinski hit’s an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. As Whitey returns to his feet, Szalinski tries for a dropkick, but Whitey steps back, causing Szalinski to crash to the mat.

Whitey tags TTS back in, and he goes to work on Szalinski, delivering a lifting DDT. TTS continues the assault, mounting Szalinski for a series of punches. TTS then twists Szalinski’s arm, and tags Whitey in. Whitey comes off the top rope with a double axe handle. Whitey slams Szalinski, then delivers a knee drop. Whitey and TTS continue this for several minutes, making quick tags back and forth, until they miss a double shoulder tackle, and get caught with a double clothesline by Szalinski. Szalinski is able to crawl to his corner and tag in Latino Meat.

Meat comes in a house of fire, catching both TTS and Whitey(the legal man) with punches, slams, and a dropkick to Whitey, knocking him out of the ring. Szalinski hit’s a brain buster on TTS, and Meat hit’s the Meat Compactor from the top rope and makes the cover. As the ref tries to explain that Whitey is the legal man, Whitey slides back in and DDTs Szalinski. As Meat turns around, Whitey nails the Burning Hammer and gets the pin.

Here are your winners, TTS and Whitey “Daddy Fat Sax” Fats!



*M.O.P. is standing backstage*

I'm gonna keep this short and sweet. MiLo Duck, watch this match, and you'll see all the proof you need as to why Jersey's Own M.O.P., one half of the WWCF Tag Team Champions, would be an invaluable asset to your team for Ernest Goes to Wargames.


M.O.P. w/ Metylerca V. Tyfo w/ LittleNaitch

Tyfo enters first, accompanied by his tag team partner, LittleNaitch. Naitch takes the mic.

As you all know a few weeks ago The Southwest Connection lost the World Tag Team Titles to members of The Pride. Now with Tromeboneman's win last week, The Connection has earned a rematch for our tag team titles which we will win and become the first ever three time WWCF World Tag Team Champions!! Now from what I understand, our rematch is at Earnest Goes To Wargames but it has not been confirmed yet by the executive committee. So what I would like, is for our rematch to be held off until the week after the pay-per-view so that way I can give my complete focus to both matches but at different times. Now don't get me wrong, I can do both matches on the same night but I really want to focus on one at a time so that way not only can I become the number one contender to the World Heavyweight Title but also become one half of the three time World Tag Team Champions!!!

Naitch drops the mic as M.O.P. runs out, accompanied by Metylerca.

M.O.P. and Tyfo face off in the center of the ring. Tyfo shoves M.O.P. and M.O.P. responds in kind. Tyfo slaps M.O.P., who retaliates with a punch, which knocks Tyfo to the mat. Tyfo jumps back to his feet, only to be clotheslined back down to the mat. M.O.P. runs the ropes, but Naitch grabs his leg, tripping him. Tyfo gets to his feet and catches M.O.P. with a power slam. He follows with a couple of elbows, followed by a fist drop from the top rope. Tyfo then picks up M.O.P. for a butterfly suplex, but M.O.P. fights out of it and hit’s a swinging neck breaker. This is followed by a fishermen’s suplex, which gets a 2-count.

M.O.P. picks up Tyfo for another suplex, but Tyfo lowblows him and hit’s the butterfly suplex. Tyfo locks in the sharpshooter, but M.O.P. fights his way to the ropes. Tyfo releases the hold, but Tyfo continues to work over M.O.P.’s leg. He pulls M.O.P. to the center of the ring and tries to lock on the Texas Cloverleaf, but M.O.P. kicks him away. M.O.P. gets to his feet and sends Tyfo into the ropes, and catches him on the way back with a Samoan drop.

M.O.P. locks in a single leg crab, but LittleNaitch jumps on the apron, distracting the referee. Metylerca runs over to Naitch’s side and they begin brawling on the floor. With the ref distracted, Tyfo slips on a pair of brass knuckles, but M.O.P. ducks the shot and hit’s the Turnpike Driver. The ref turns around and sees M.O.P. going for the cover. 1-2-3.

Here is your winner, M.O.P!

Metylerca rolls into the ring to celebrate with M.O.P., as Tyfo and Naitch walk up the ramp, upset over the loss.



Triple Threat Match For Contendership To The Inter-Forum Championship: Legion V. SuperSmark V. Above Average

SuperSmark makes his way to the ring, typing on his laptop. Legion enters next, and causes flames to erupt from the turnbuckles and the stage. Above Average enters last, walking to the ring, as pyro erupts behind him.

All 3 square off center ring. Legion and SuperSmark act as if they’re going to gang up on Above Average, but when Smark turns towards Above Average, Legion grabs him and tosses him shoulder first into the turnbuckle. He follows with a DDT and tosses SuperSmark from the ring. Above Average and Legion lock up, with Above Average getting the better of the initial exchange. Legion steps back, then charges at Above Average, who catches him with a back body drop. He follows this with a pump kick, followed by a backbreaker. Above Average goes for the pin, but Legion kicks out at 2. Above Average goes for a delayed vertical suplex, but Legion fights out of it and hit’s a blockbuster, followed by a splash. Legion goes for the pin, but SuperSmark breaks it up.

Smark German suplex’s Legion and makes a cover, earning a 2-count. Smark stomps on Legion, then delivers an elbow drop, getting another 2-count. Above Average grabs Smark and hit’s a swinging neck breaker. He then delivers a running leg lariat, and locks on a cross arm breaker. Smark screams in pain, and is about to tap, when Legion breaks the hold. He tosses Smark into the ropes and he and Above Average hit a double dropkick. The former partners continue to doubleteam Smark, and finish him off with a Superkick and the Fall From Grace. Above Average and Legion high five each other, but Legion surprises Above Average with a kick to the ribs, then tosses him to the outside. Legion covers Smark, and gets the 3-count.

Here is your winner, and the number one contender to the Inter-Forum Championship, Legion!

As Legion celebrates, Above Average stares at him from the ramp. Legion motions that the title will soon be his.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Jonathan Michaels


Wrestler Name: Jonathan Michaels

Height(anything below 7'0) 6'3"

Weight(anything under 400)240

Hometown: Los Angeles, California

Alignment(heel or face): Face

Gimmick Description: Hollywood stuntman wanting his turn in the spotlight.

Appearance(what does your wrestler look like?)
Longish black hair, goatee with stubble, looks vaguely like several diffrent Hollywood stars, but not quite, good shape, but not ripped.

Apparel(what does your wrestler wear?):
His own T-shirt, open black dress shirt over it, jeans, hiking boots

Fighting Style(such as brawler, hardcore, ect.):
Street fighter, but can properly wrestle if called upon.

Theme Music: "Original Prankster" The Offspring

Entrance Description:
Smoke, no pyro, video of dangerous film stunts

10 to 20 Moves your wrestler uses:
Clothesline
Armbar
Spear
Boston Crab
Moonsault
Snap Suplex
DDT
Spinebuster
Belly to Back Suplex
Arm Drag
Sidewalk Slam

Finishing Moves(you can do up to 2):

Fade to Black(super kick)
The Key Grip(ankle lock)

Monday Niteraw - February 9, 2009

Monday Niteraw
February 9, 2009

*Motor-Colt comes out to the ring to his normal music, wearing the crown*

Ladies and Gentlemen, feel privileged for you are the first to bear witness to King Motor-Colt, a title that I of course earnt when I won the first ever King of WrestleCrap tournament by defeating my good friend Wordlife. Now once again I’d like to thank the Evil one for giving me the match of my career. But I think that’s been said more than enough. Now onto business.

After my victory, as I was getting set to leave the arena. I was attacked. But none other than Cthulhu, also known as Providence, making his return to the WWCF, so of course he wanted to make his return as big as possible, and we went the right way about it. But more on that later.

Milo Duck, the WWCF Champion, my opponent for Ernest Goes to Wargames… You and I may be considered friends, but there’s something you need to realise. You and you’re championship reign is on borrowed time. I’m not just putting myself over like every other person who has faced you for your title, this is the real deal. I mean think about it…

Usually the World Champion is the focal point of the whole company, and don’t get me wrong, for a while you were. But it seems you’ve simply been a footnote for the last month or so. I mean you didn’t even defend your title at the last PPV, and you took a backseat to far superior competitors.

Milo, the WWCF is no longer about you, it’s about a select few men who have simply taken the entire industry by storm, of course that is The Story. I’m not just blowing smoke here, I’m stating a stone cold fact! Think about Above Average, the current Inter-Forum champion, he’s the most fightingest wrestler I have ever seen, unlike you, he’s actually defended his title every opportunity he gets… successfully I might add. He’s the guy all the up and comers test themselves against. Then you have Wordlife, he’s been the main event since the beginning and every single person on the roster sees and respects that and look up to him to further their careers… and then of course there’s me. Your King.

Over the last few months, everyone in the WWCF seems to be involved with me. You have guys like Cthulhu, who has essentially used me to make a bigger name for himself, which is why both times he went to make a big step up in his career he started it by attacking me. Then there’s his former friend Seth Drakin, who is actually standing against Cthulhu’s attack on me and is using it to help drive their feud. Then you have The Family, they ran the WWCF until I formed the Story, now they take every chance they get to turn the Story away. You have The Family’s LittleNaitch, he’s managed to look beyond the Story/Family feud and has approached me as an Ally. Then you have Metylerca, after he was involved in a match with me he became more motivated than ever and look at him now. And you also have Koda and Aaron Enigma, two up and comers who have managed to captivate everyones imagination, what helped drive that? First off was the build up to me vs Koda that made Koda realise his own potential and then Aaron Enigma was truly captivated by our interactions that it changed how Enigma viewed the wrestling business, hell it was because of their interactions with me that they had a match with eachother which helped boost the careers of both men.

You see Milo? If me and the Story do anything, it impacts the whole company… but don’t think I’m taking these people for granted, infact I have the power the reward them and I’ll do just that. I still have 3 names to announce for Wargames, and I’ve finally narrowed it down. Cthulhu wants to my attention? He’s got it. He wants to make an impact… well I’m giving him that chance. He’s in. Then there’s another man, someone with enough passion and drive for this business that he’s put respect over rivalries… that man is LittleNaitch. Now finally, there are three up and comers that have caught my attention lately, so I figured I’d let them fight it out to determine who the final competitor will be. So next week there will be a triple threat between Metylerca, Koda and Aaron Enigma, with the winner taking the final spot in the Wargames match!

Now Milo, you go ahead and pick your team, but don’t take too long deciding, I want you to cherish your final moments with the WWCF Championship. It’s only a matter of time before the King takes his right place on his throne.

Everything you ever wanted, everything you ever knew, everything you ever lust for will be taken from you… Courtesy of The Story on Page One!

_________________________________________________


Non-Title Hardcore Triathlon: Evil Masked wordlifeecw V. WWCF Hardcore Champion The General of the Monkey Army(The two will face off in three different hardcore events. They are not matches)

Out in the parking lot, a mini-obstacle course has been constructed. To the right side of the course, we see a pit filled with thumbtacks, broken glass, and barbed wire, and above that pit, are two platforms, with an empty space directly over the pit. On the left side, we see an arm wrestling table, and a small basket filled with more barbed wire, thumbtacks, and broken glass, as well as a bucket of glue and a roll of tape. In the center of the parking lot, D-Day Dave is standing with WWCF Hardcore Champion The General of the Monkey Army and Evil Masked wordlifeecw.

D-Day Dave- Welcome everyone to the first ever WWCF Hardcore Triathlon.

Event #1: Extreme Thumb Wrestling

The General and wordlifeecw step up to the table. Before the contest begins, each competitor may equip their thumbs with whatever weaponry they want. The General wraps some barbed wire around his left thumb, while having the referee wrap some tape around his right thumb. He then dips that thumb in the glue, and then into the bucket, coming back up with glass all over his thumb. Wordlifeecw glues some barbed wire and thumbtacks to both of his thumbs.

The rules: Both competitors will fight, using only their thumbs. The match ends when one competitor removes BOTH of his thumbs from the table.

At the referee’s signal, wordlifeecw begins jabbing his left thumb at the General, trying to latch on to him. The General plays keep away, making quick slices at wordlifeecw, quickly slicing his right thumb open. Wordlifeecw tries to draw blood as well, but the General’s reflexes are quicker. Finally, wordlifeecw tells the referee to look behind him. When the ref turns away, wordlifeecw jabs The General in the eye. The ref turns around and sees the General clutching his eye with both hands(inadvertently harming himself even more) and stops the event.

Michael Muffer: Ladies and gentlemen, the first event has been awarded to Evil Masked wordlifeecw!

_________________________________________________

60 Minute Exhibition Match: Stryker Dark Silence
V.
???????? (Opponent to picked by Amigo)

Michael Muffer: Our next match is a 60 minute exhibition. It will be fought under pure wrestling rules, meaning their can be only 3 rope breaks for each competitor, and no closed fists. However this match will not be contended under standard pinfall, submission, disqualification or countout rules. The match is a showcase of some of the very best talents in WWCF, and the only way the match will be called to an early finish within it's time limit is if one wrestler is deemed. unable to continue or defend themselves sufficiently.

*The bagpipes sound and drums roll as Stryker paces out intently toward the ring*

Michael Muffer: Accompanied by the reigning Wrestlecrap Heavyweight Champion of the World, Milo Duck, hailing from the 'depths of a soul', and weighing in at 235 pounds, Stryker Dark Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiilence!!

*Stryker rolls into the ring and takes Muffer's mic*

Ok Amigo, I'm here, I'm ready to blow your hair back, who do you need me to carry for this extravaganza?

*Amigo stands up from the commentary table*

I've got something special, just for you Stryker...winner of the King of Wrestlecrap tournament, MOTOR-COLT!

*Phantom of the Opera by Iron Maiden kicks in and Motor-Colt appears, one hand with a finger extended n the air. He walks to the ring, slapping hands with fans, but fixed on Stryker, who has dropped his jacket and is unbelting his kilt. Colt rolls into the ring and stands in the centre, raising his arm again and removing his cape, and then heads to two corners to acknowledge the crowd further. He climbs down and faces Stryker as the house lights go down and the ring lights hit.*

The bell rings and the clock appears ticking over in the corner of the big screen. Stryker approaches, offering his hand, which Colt hesitates over, then shakes firmly, before stepping back. Both men circle the ring, slowly, methodically, looking for an opening. Stryker goes for a test of strength grip, but his raised hand is slapped away by MC. He tries again, but MC slaps away again, so Stryker lunges for the collar and elbow tie up. The pair are fairly evenly matched for strength, so Stryker tries to throw a knee, MC using his shift of weight to grab a headlock, and wrench hard on his neck. Stryker tries to pull at the locked fingers, but is unable to break the hold. He goes for the right lower leg, sweeping it out sending MC to one knee, but he keeps the lock on hard. Locking his own hands together, Stryker powers up sending MC over into a back suplex, hitting hard, but MC keeps hold of the headlock, and wrenches back on the neck, trying to hook his legs round too into an adapted mount. Stryker kicks up into a crab position, and shows great flexibility and flips through, still in the headlock, reversing the weight and pressure onto MC's chest and shoulders. MC wrenches back, pulling Stryker upside down, and nearly back over, but Stryker drops his weight and brings an elbow down into MC's midriff, loosening the grip. He holds his neck in pain for a moment, but latches on with a chinlock on MC, cranking back, but MC is quick enough to stand up and bring Stryker down in a jawbreaker, sending him reeling back against the ropes, holding his neck and chin. Motor-Colt runs at Stryker with a European Uppercut and whips him across the ring. Stryker is aware enough to roll through under a flying knee and come back again. MC ducks a Lariat attempt and release armdrags Stryker on the rebound again, but Stryker responds with his own armdrag on MC, and goes for the short arm scissors. MC wriggles free before he can complete the hold and the pair stand and face off again at 17 minutes.

Both wary of the others holds they approach cautiousy. Motor-Colt tries to go for the collar tie up to put more pressure on Stryker's neck, but he fires a sharp low kick into MC's thigh. He steps out, but Stryker advances with the striking combo, throwing kicks and palm strikes, making smacking connections with MC's body. MC partially blocks a palm strike, but Stryker grabs the wrist and twists into an Arm Wringer. MC is light on his feet and stops Stryker wrenching it back into a hammerlock backing into the corner, forcing the referee to call for the break. Clean break by Stryker, but he sharply brings a knife edge chop into MC's chest, bringing 'WOOOOs' from the crowd. Stryker chops at him twice more and throws an elbow into his jaw, reeling MC round and leaning over the ropes. Stryker runs across the ring, and comes back....BLOCKBUSTER OVER THE TOP, HANGING MC UP ON THE TOP ROPE. Stryker lands hard outside, while MC is sprung back into the ring, gasping for breath at 24 minutes.

Nursing his neck again, Stryker gets back to his feet on the outside, as MC holds his throat, coughing. Stryker breathes hard, spits on the rubber mats, high fives with Milo, who shouts encouragement, then walks up to the announce table, bringing his fist down hard onto it in front of Amigo, who looks on unflinching. Stryker turns and slides into the ring as MC rises to his feet with his back to him. Stryker takes the chance and runs at MC and goes for the German Suplex, but MC lands on his feet. Stryker tries to throw a kick to his stomach, but MC catches it at his side. He throws the other heel at MC in an attempt at a reverse enzuigiri, but MC catches that too. Motor-Colt in the ascendency, he goes for the Ocean Wheelbarrow Suplex, but there is yet another reversal as Stryker tries to hit the Handspring Bulldog. He nearly faceplants MC, but MC powers up and puts Stryker over the top rope with a back suplex, who unbelievably lands on his feet on the apron. Stryker grabs the top rope and swings his legs through, hitting a modified dropkick into MC's back. MC retaliates with a charging European Uppercut, but Stryker hits the shoulder to the gut through the ropes, sending him back, wheezing again. Stryker pulls himself up and goes for the Springboard Crossbody but MC grabs the arm and pulls him over head and slams him into the mat with an epic Modified Armdrag and grabs the Armbar, locked on hard. Milo calls out for his partner to fight the hold but Mto Stryker has no option but to kick out a leg onto the ropes, forcing the break. The referee forces them apart, Stryker having 2 rope breaks remaining at 34 minutes.

Stryker guarding both his arm and his neck, drags himself to his feet. MC spots an opening and goes for a Running DDT, but Stryker grabs a leg, and reverses into a hard single leg takedown, and locks on the heel hook. MC struggles and writhes, tapping not an option in this match. MC finally manages to put his boot flat into Stryker's face and kicks him away, bumping hard backwards. MC limps, but perhaps spurred on by the pain launches at Stryker with a flying forearm but is taken down into a Front Facelock. Stryker breathlessly wrenches up on MC's neck, but he powers up into a Jawbreaker. Gritting his teeth through the pain of his lower leg he runs off the ropes and hits the Million Dollar Knee Lift, sending Stryker flying backwards and...yes, the blood has started, old wounds bursting open. Motor-Colt points the one hand to the sky again and as Stryker stuggles to his feet hits a Running Neckbreaker, sending him sprawing to the canvas. Motor Colt is up top and waiting...waiting...Stryker is up to his feet, he turns and CHARGES MC BEFORE HE COMES OFF WITH THE FLYING FOREARM, AND BRINGS HIM OFF WITH AN OVERHEAD BELLY TO BELLY SUPERPLEX. Both men are laid out on the canvas, breathing hard at 45 minutes.

Stryker struggles to his feet first, smearing the blood and sweat away from his eyes. Motor-Colt rolls over and pulls himself over into a crouched position. Stryker reaches over the ropes and clasps hands with Milo, then slaps his chest. He pounces on MC and locks on the Sleeper! MC fights, but it's tightly held. He's turning bright red, struggling away, but getting weaker. This could be over soon, Stryker has him down to the mat and MC is nearly out, but wait...STRYKER BREAKS THE SLEEPER! He shakes his head! He doesn't want to end the match, he's not done with the exhibition yet! Stryker now grabs the leg of the prone MC and rolls him over into the Half-Boston Crab. Life snaps back into MC and he struggles and strains again, but can't reverse it, not enough breath in his lungs, so he lunges for the ropes, using the first of his 3 breaks, and contracts his body, slingshotting Stryker against the ropes and over to the outside head first at 54 minutes.

Blood now pouring from Stryker's head, he climbs onto the apron, as MC lies getting his breath back. He's heading up top. MC is resting under the ropes, Stryker is going to go for the guillotine legdrop off the top. He wants to crush MC! He leaps and flies...MOTOR-COLT MOVES! Stryker crashes one leg against the apron and falls to the outside, gripping at his lower back, feeling the shock. MC rolls to the outside and grabs Stryker, rolling him back into the ring. Motor-Colt signals and is going for The Story On Page One. He hoists Stryker up and holds him delayed, his blood dripping onto the canvas. MC brings him down for the Cutter finish, but Stryker gets his feet down first and scoops up MC for his own Cyclone Cutter. He throws him over his shoulder for the finish, but MC reverses himself into the Reverse DDT. Both men struggle to their feet together as the crowd count down the final minute, and look set to exchange blows when the bell rings...THE EXHIBITION IS OVER!!

Both men look exhausted, they stare each other out for a moment...and then both smile. They hug in the ring, congratulating each other on the Gladiatorial battle they endured. Motor-Colt raises Stryker's hand as the crowd sound their appreciation at the efforts of both men. Stryker raises Motor-Colt's hand, and the pair hug again.

Motor-Colt exits as Stryker, wiping blood from his eyes, takes the mic, and leans on the ropes, staring at Amigo. Milo rolls into the ring and pats Stryker on the back, the pair showing a united front.

You've seen what I can do Amigo, and that doesn't even scratch the surface! Give me what I'm due Mr Commisioner!

Good work, Stryker. You held your own against the King of Wrestlecrap winner. Perhaps you are more then just a tag wrestler. As such, I have went to the Board of Directors, and they have agreed to a title shot in your future. And I have issued a shot against the World champ MiLo in the future. May the best man win.

*Stryker reels away and looks up at the lights, around at the crowd and then at Milo*

I'm honoured that you consider me World Title material Amigo, and pleased my talents have finally be recognised, but you know, just like everybody else here, that I would never raise a hand against Milo, and so I will have to decline your offer of a shot. Please, give me my chance at the Inter-Forum title, or even the Hardcore...

Out of the question. This title shot is cleared by all the higher-ups. It is this title shot or nothing. If you do not wish for it, you will forfeit it. Perhaps someone like Square or Starshine would be more appreciative of this chance?

*Stryker winces and drops to his knees, with anguish and exhaustion, Milo comes over and helps him back to his feet, and the pair start to walk to the back, a medic giving Stryker's forehead attention, starting to mop up the blood, just as they get to the stage, Stryker turns back to face the arena*

YOU DO JUST THAT AMIGO! SEE HOW FAR IT GETS YOU! You can bait me all you like, but I'm no traitor. Watch how much money it draws you when one of two guys who we destroyed gets a shot, because people know they can't lace Milo's boots! But I've told you again and again Amigo...Don't bite the hand that feeds you! You want me to show I'm good enough to grant requests to? I did that tonight, but I'll do it again and again. So you try it. You set me whatever matches you like, and win or lose I'll prove to you I can be whatever a champion needs to be without going against my standards! You set them up Amigo...and I will STRYKE THEM OUT!!

___________________________________

Tag Team Match
The Wargame Warriors: Stevierichardsfan and Krazy E-Man w/ Eli
V.
The Crusade: The Tank and “Evil La Parka” w/ Seth Drakin

The match starts out with “Evil La Parka” and stevierichardsfan. They lock up and start chain wrestling each other with neither getting the upper hand. Eventually they start punching each other and Parka takes out Stevie’s leg but Stevie is back up and takes out Parka’s leg and then they both nip up and are at a stalemate. Parka offers his hand and Stevie accepts it but then they both start punching each other. Parka irish whips Stevie into the corner and comes running at him but Stevie gets out of the way at the last second and goes for a roll up pin on Parka but only gets a two count.

Both men get back up and Parka runs towards a corner with Stevie running after him. Parka trails up the corner and flips over Stevie coming in in a big matrix like move and then pushes Stevie into the corner and delivers a big drop kick sending Stevie back into the corner and knocking him down on his back. Parka goes for the cover but only gets a two count. Parka drags Stevie to his corner and tags in The Tank and holds Stevie’s arm as Tank kicks Stevie in the ribs.

The Tank pulls Stevie in close and gives him a belly to belly suplex. The Tank picks Stevie back up and suplexes him to the mat and goes for the pin but Krazy jumps in and breaks up the pin. The Tank pushes Krazy back into his corner but from behind Tank Stevie delivers a dropkick on him making him go forward right into a big clothesline from Krazy. Stevie drags Tank over to his corner and tags in Krazy. Krazy irish whips The Tank from one rope to the other and when he comes back Krazy delivers a big boot to Tank’s head. Krazy picks up Tank and gives him a big sidewalk slam and goes for the pin but “Parka” jumps over the top rope with a leg drop to krazy’s head to break up the pin. “Evil La Parka then hurls himself in a suicide like effort at Stevie knocking them both to the concrete floor.

As Krazy gets up ready to go out and help his partner The Tank levels Krazy with The Shouten. The Tank picks up Krazy and hits the Ode To The Funker(jumping pile driver followed by a spinning toe hold). Tank goes for the cover and gets the 123!!!!!!

Michael Muffer- Here are your winners……………The Crusade: The Tank and “Evil La Parka”

*After the match, The Crusade sneak attack the Warriors and Seth grabs a lead pipe from under the ring. Seth looks like he is about to hit stevierichardsfan with the lead pipe, but Eli comes in to try to stop the assault. Unfortunately, Seth instead turns around and hits her over the head with the lead pipe to the shock of everyone, including Seth Drakin. Seth drops the lead pipe as he and the Crusade get out of the ring. The Warriors try to tend to their fallen teammate while Seth looks on in shock. A close up shows Seth saying that it was an accident while the other two members of the Crusade escort him to the back. The Warriors show concern as Eli is placed on a stretcher by EMTs.*

__________________________________________________________
*Aaron is seen backstage putting on his trenchcoat and fedora, he looks focused and he speaks with his back to the camera*
Tonight, I solve a great mystery. Cthulhu, tonight I will gain all of your secrets. To be honest, I could care less that Square is in here. I'll keep my eye out for him, but tonight is all about vengeance. You injured my friend Motor-Colt, and unforgivable act of sin.

*Aaron turns to to face the camera, rage evident on his face*
Square, I don't want to hurt you, stay out of my way tonight. I am going to end Cthulhu the only way I know how to fight a crazed psycho. By thinking like a crazed psycho. Tonight, I will let all my inhibitions run wild, and when the match is over, your life, Cthulhu, will never be the same. I'm Aaron Enigma, and tonight the question is this: Will Cthulhu be breathing when the match is over?

___________________________________________

Triple Threat Match
Head Detective Aaron Enigma
V.
Square
V.
Cthulhu

The match starts right as the bell rings with Aaron charging Cthulhu. he tackles him to the ground and starts punching him in a fit of rage. Square comes from behind and nails Aaron in the back of the head, ending the spree of fists to Cthulhu and allowing him to escape. Square and Cthulhu start to brawl back and forth as Aaron recovers from the big punch. He gets up and clotheslines both men while they are distracted. He picks up Cthulhu and throws him out of the ring. He goes after him but Square hits a dropkick as Aaron is getting out and he gets kicked to the ground.

Cthulhu picks up Aaron and rams his back into the ring. Square hits a baseball slide sending both men into the security wall. Square gets out of the ring and throws Aaron back in. He puts Aaron in a chinlock but Aaron quickly escapes only to get thrown to the ground while running away. Square puts a hammerlock on Aaron and holds him on the ground. Aaron slowly makes his way to his feet and reverses the submission and hits a back suplex on Square. Aaron gets up only to walk right into Cthulhu and gets hit with a DDT. Cthulhu goes for the pin but Square breaks it up. Cthulhu and Square goes back and forth with punches until Cthulhu loses his patience and delivers a kick to the midsecion followed by another DDT.

Cthulhu gets up not realizing Aaron is waiting. Aaron runs up and hits a German Suplex on Cthulhu then locks him in the Gorilla Clutch. Cthulhu slowly makes his way to the ropes but Aaron drags him back to the center. Seeing Cthulhu is about to tap out, Square hits Aaron with the Squareplosion, knocking Aaron into a turnbuckle

Cthulhu clotheslines square out of the ring and picks Aaron up and hits the Death Magnetic and pins him for the win.

Michael Muffer- Here is your winner……………..Cthulhu aka Providence!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

________________________________________

Non-Title Hardcore Triathalon: Evil Masked wordlifeecw V. WWCF Hardcore Champion The General of the Monkey Army(The two will face off in three different hardcore events. They are not matches)

Event #2: Extreme Tug-of-War

After a short break to allow both men to wash their hands, they take their places above the pit.

Rules: Pull your opponent into the pit below.

Wordlifeecw and The General each take a hold of the barbed wire rope and wait for the ref’s signal. At go, both men pull trying to get the other one in the pit. Wordlifeecw, the bigger of the two, seems to have an easy time, having General almost off the platform. Thinking quick, the General tells wordlifeecw he has something on his mask. Wordlifeecw takes one hand off the rope to check his mask. The General pulls with both hands, yanking wordlifeecw into the barbed wire, glass, and thumbtack filled pit.

Michael Muffer: The winner of the second event, The General of the Monkey Army!

________________________________________

Six Man Tag Match
The Pride: grbjazzman and WWCF World Tag Team Champions M.O.P. and Metylerca
V.
The Sam09 Family: TromboneWeight Champion TromboneMan and The Southwest Connection: Tyfo and LittleNaitch w/ The Sam09

Muffer – The following contest is set for one fall.
(The Family’s music plays)
Making their way to the ring, at a combined weight of 720 lbs. Accompanied by their manager, The Sam, they are Littlenaitch, Tyfo and the Tromboneweight champion Tromboneman. The Family.
(The Sam walks down to the ring with The Family in tow)
And their opponents,
(Lions roar, Pride music)
At a combined weight of 668 lbs. They are GrbJazzman and the WWCF Tag Team Champions, Metylerca and M.O.P The Pride.
(The Pride makes their way to the ring high fiving the fans)

Bell rings
the match starts out with Metylerca representing The Pride facing Tyfo representing The Family. They lock up. Tyfo locks in a headlock. Metylerca attempts to send Tyfo off the ropes but as he does Tyfo grabs a handful of Metylercas hair swinging him around into a headlock. Metylerca attempts to send Tyfo off the ropes a second time and yet again Tyfo grabs a handful of Metylercas hair, swinging himself around into a headlock. Metylerca then gives the thumbs up to the crowd before sending Tyfo up for a back body drop. Metylerca goes for a three count.
1
2
2 count
Metylerca drags Tyfo over to the Pride corner and tags in M.O.P Metylerca locks Tyfo into a double chicken wing as M.O.P. climbs the ropes and delivers an axe handle chop. Tyfo is reeling. M.O.P. Hits a clothesline on Tyfo before going for a three count.
1
2
count is broken byLittlenaitch.
M.O.P. Yells at Littlenaitch to get out of the ring, as he does Tyfo hits a running bulldog on M.O.P Tyfo tags in Tromboneman.
Tromboneman hits Haymaker after Haymaker before hitting a snap suplex, Tromboneman goes for the quick 3 count.
1
2
2 count
Tromboneman tags in Littlenaitch who starts hitting knife edge chops, with each chop the crowd goes “Woo!” Littlenaitch attempts a hip toss but M.O.P. reverses it into a hip toss of his own sending Littlenaitch across the ring. M.O.P. Approaches Littleniatch who is pleading for forgiveness, Littlenaithc then sends a boot to M.O.P.’s mid section. Naitch then puts M.O.P. into the corner turnbuckle and proceeds delivering some chops, M.O.P. ducks a chop and starts hitting some chops of his own. Littleniatch attempts to chop his way out of the corner but M.O.P. grabs Naitches arm and locks in an armbar from out of no where. M.O.P. Synchs it in tight before Tyfo makes the save.
M.O.P. Tags in Grbjazzman who delivers some kicks to Littlenaitch, Grbjazzman eventually delivers a yakuza kick to the face of Naitch sending him to the mat. Jazzman goes up to the second rope and delivers a picture perfect second rope elbow to Naitch. Jazzman goes for the 3 count.
1
2
2 count
As Jazzman attempts to raise Naitch to his feet; Naitch rakes Jazzman’s eyes. Naicth stumbles over to The Family’s corner before tagging in Tyfo. Tyfo delivers a Double Axe handle from the top rope to Jazzman, which sends him down. Tyfo begins taunting The Pride, which sends them into the ring. As the referee holds The Pride back, The Family takes advantage of a fallen Jazzman.
The Family return to their corner as Tyfo locks in a sharpshooter on Jazzman. The Pride cheer on Jazzman to escape the hold, The Family cheer on Tyfo to break Jazzman in 2. Jazzman reaches for the rope but The Sam grabs the bottom rope and pulls it back.
The referee see’s The Sam pull the rope and tells him to step back or The Family will be DQ’d.
While this is happening Jazzman manages to reverse the hold into another sharpshooter. The fans are screaming for Tyfo to tap but Tyfo manages to crawl to the ropes and grab on.
Both Jazzman and Tyfo are barely making it to their feet, as they do they start throwing punches at each other. Punch after punch. Finally Tyfo misses a punch and Jazzman who hits a DDT on Tyfo.
Both men are now barely conscious, they begin crawling their way to their respective teams for a hot tag. As Jazzman makes his way to the corner Littlenaitch runs in and grabs Jazzman’s leg and pulls him back. The referee sends Naitch back to his corner but the referee doesn’t see Jazzman tag M.O.P. As MOP comes in to attack Tyfo the referee sends MOP back to his corner as Tyfo makes a tag to Tromboneman.
Tromboneman grabs Jazzman and prepares to hit the “C Note”, but Jazzman out of desperation hits “Takin’ the A Train”.
Jazzman crawls to his corner and tags M.O.P.
M.O.P comes in and begins cleaning house-throwing punches at everyone he can see. M.O.P. Comes off the ropes and The Sam grabs his ankle, MOP grabs The Sam by the collar and lifts him onto the apron. Anarchy ensues. Everyone is attacking everyone else. MOP gets knocked into Jazzman, which the referee counts as a tag. Tromboneman calls in Littlenaitch and they both knock MOP to the outside. Tromboneman grabs Jazzman in a double arm chicken wing as Littleniatch grabs Trombonemans Trombone and prepares to KO Jazzman with it as the referee is distracted by Tyfo and Metylerca brawling on the outside.
Naicth attempts to KO Jazzman but Jazzman ducks and Naitch attacks Tromboneman by mistake. Jazzman sends a stunned Niatch to the outside who lands on top of The Sam.
Jazzman goes for the pinfall on a KO’d Tromboneman.
1
2
3
The winners, THE PRIDE!
All 3 members of The Pride celebrate in the ring under the roar of the fans approval as The Family bicker with each other on the way back to the dressing room.

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Non-Title Hardcore Triathalon: Evil Masked wordlifeecw V. WWCF Hardcore Champion The General of the Monkey Army(The two will face off in three different hardcore events. They are not matches)

Event # 3: Extreme Joust

Rules: Both men get on motorcycles armed with barbed wire covered kendo sticks. When the ref calls GO both men ride towards each other and try to knock the other off.

Both men battered and beaten from the previous events get on their respected motorcycles and arm themselves with their barbed wire kendo sticks. They rev up the bikes as they wait for the ref to yell go. The ref yells GO and they peal out towards each other. As they meet they hit each other but no one falls off their bike. They turn back around and charge again revving up even harder. This time they both connect viciously ramming into each other with a double kendo stick clothesline and knock each other off. Medics come running in and it is clear that neither man can continue. They are both loaded up into ambulances and driven off.

Michael Muffer- It seems that both men can not continue so this even has been ruled a draw!!!!!!!

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Non-Title Singles Match
Champions Showcase: WWCF World Champion MiLo Duck
V.
WWCF Inter-Forum Champion Above Average

The two champions exchange a tense handshake before locking up. Above Average locks on a side headlock, MiLo fights out of it, whips Above Average into the ropes, and Above Average bounces back with a swinging neck breaker. The Inter-Forum Champion then delivers a backbreaker, followed by a delayed vertical suplex. Above Average picks up MiLo for another suplex, but MiLo catches him in a small package, getting a 2-count. MiLo stomps Above Average, and locks on an armbar. Above Average reaches the ropes, forcing MiLo to break the hold. The World Champion whips Above Average into the ropes and hit’s a flying clothesline, earning another 2-count. MiLo picks up Above Average for a suplex, but Above Average blocks it and hit’s a suplex of his own. The Inter-Forum Champion then hit’s a Sit-Out Powerbomb, gaining a 2-count. Above Average tosses MiLo into the corner and goes for a big splash, but MiLo moves, causing Above Average to crash into the turnbuckle. MiLo mounts the turnbuckle and fires off a series of punches to Above Average, with the crowd quacking along with each punch. MiLo picks up Above Average and goes for the QuackerJack, but Above Average reverses it into a hurricanrana. As MiLo gets up, Above Average hit’s the Superkick and gets the pin.

Michael Muffer: Here is your winner, the WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, Above Average!

After the match, as Above Average is celebrating, Legion runs in from behind and locks Above Average in the Arms of Morpheus. Security runs down to try and pull him off, but SuperSmark runs out and chases them off, and starts beating Above Average with his laptop while Legion holds him in the sleeper. Finally, MiLo pulls Legion off and chases him and SuperSmark away, and goes to check on Above Average.