Sunday Night Heatz!!1 - February 22, 2009

Sunday Night Heatz!!1
2/22/09

*Stock footage of a Nuclear Bomb detonating is played with the words "Sunday Night Heatz!!1" is shown. The camera then pans out to the Parts Unknown Arena's ringside announcer booth where the commentators of the evening are seated*

The Sam: Hello Humanoids and welcome to the Championship edition of Sunday Night Heatz, I am the "Manager of Champions" and "2006 Time Magazine Person of the Year" The Sam.

Amigo: And I am former World Champion, John S. Amigo. And welcome again fans, to Sunday Night Heatz. We got a big night, don't we Sam?

The Sam: You better believe it Doctor, every match tonight is a Title Match. Tonight we will see the greatest - wait scratch that - the GREATEST TAG TEAM IN HISTORY! The Southwest Connection take on The Pride for the WWCF Tag Team titles, and in our Main Event we have the WWCF Inter-Forum Champion Above Average defending his title against the Dark One, Legion. But first in our opening match we have the WWCF Hardcore Champion, General of the Monkey Army, taking on the Evil Masked Wordlifeecw.
What do you think of that Doc?

Amigo: My bladder explodes with happiness. And now, our first match of the night: Evil Masked Wordlifeecw versus The General of the Monkey Army for the WWCF Hardcore title.

The Sam: I know more than anyone the kind of danger that Evil Mask can bring, and so that is why I believe Evil Mask may walk out tonight as the winner. What about you Doc, who do you pick?

Amigo: Ah, but The General is Champion for a reason. He is seasoned in Hardcore wrestling. Between his resourcefulness, and Wordlife's brutality, it should be interesting.


WWCF Hardcore Championship: Evil Masked wordlifeecw V. The General of the Monkey Army [c]

Michael Muffer: Ladies and gentlemen, our first match of the evening is set for one fall, and it is for the WWCF Hardcore Championship!
(The arena goes black, as Evil Masked wordlifeecw’s music hits)
Introducing first, from Parts Unknown, Massachusetts, he weighs in at 320 pounds, and he is the challenger. Ladies and gentlemen, Evil Masked wordlifeecw!
(wordlifeecw enters the ring and sets off his pyro, bringing the lights back up)

(The General’s music hits, as the General makes his way out, accompanied by his pet monkey)
And the opponent, from Lansing, Michigan, weighing in at 225 pound, he is the WWCF Hardcore Champion, The General of the Monkey Army!

Wordlifeecw and The General get up in each other’s faces, as the referee calls for the opening bell. The General challenges wordlifeecw to a test of strength. They lock up, with wordlifeecw winning the exchange. Wordlifeecw whips the General into the ropes, and catches him on the rebound with a scoop slam. Cover, 1. 2. Kick out. Wordlifeecw tosses the General to the outside, then leaves the ring as well. The Evil Masked One reaches under the ring and pulls out a cookie sheet, a trash can, and a bag of tumbtacks, which he tosses into the ring. He grabs the General and whips into the crowd control barrier. As the Evil One charges, however, the General moves out of the way, and wordlifeecw goes flying over the barrier and into the crowd. The General follows him, and the fight truly begins. The General and wordlifeecw brawl in the crowd, giving the fans an up close and personal view of the action. The General makes use of his surroundings, asking fans to give him their chairs, which he uses to try and cave in wordlifeecw’s head. The General and the Evil Masked One brawl their way to back of the arena, where the General throws the Evil One into the backboard. The General climbs a set of steps up to the “crow’s nest” and dives off onto his challenger, knocking the Evil Masked One to the floor. Cover, 1. 2. Kick out. The General picks up a nearby shovel and prepares to deliver a crushing blow. The Evil One gets up, but as the General swings, wordlifeecw ducks, and the General ends up hitting the backboard instead. Wordlifeecw grabs the General by the throat and tosses him against the backboard, and follows up with a running splash. The General falls to the ground face first, and wordlifeecw rolls him over and makes the cover. 1. 2. Kick out.

Evil Masked wordlifeecw grabs the General by the back of the neck and starts leading him back to the ring. As they approach the crowd barrier, The General sucker punches wordlifeecw and whips him back over the barrier. The General follows him over, and grabs a chair from ringside. The General smashes wordlifeecw with the chair and rolls him into the ring. The General follows him back in and grabs the trashcan that wordlifeecw brought in earlier. The General turns the trashcan upside down, and various weapons and pieces of garbage fall out. He hits wordlifeew in the head with the trashcan, then picks up a picture frame that fell out of the trashcan. He puts around wordlifeecw’s head, then stomps him. Another cover only yields a 3-count, however. The General, getting frustrated by his inability to put the Evil One away, picks up the bag of thumbtacks, and empties it in the middle of the ring. He whips wordlifeecw into the ropes and catches him with a spine buster, RIGHT ON THE THUMBTACKS!!! Cover, 1! 2! NO!!! KICK OUT!!! The General can’t believe it! The General stomps wordlifeecw and goes for another cover. 1! 2! NO!!! wordlifeecw throws the General right off of him! The General grabs the cookie sheet and hits wordlifeecw with it. Cover, 1! 2! NO!!!! The General stares in horror as the Evil One sits up! The General throws a big right hand(The Monkey Paw) but wordlifeecw catches the punch and bends the General’s hand back. Wordlifeecw whips the General into the ropes and catches him with a big boot, knocking the General out of the ring. Wordlifecw rolls to the floor and tosses the General back in the ring. He picks up the General and delivers a brutal Journey to Hell on the thumbtacks! 1! 2! 3!

Muffer: Here is your winner, and the NEW WWCF Hardcore Champion, EVIL MASKED WORDLIFEECW!!!

The referee hands wordlifeecw the belt, as the General is helped to the back. The Evil Masked One holds the belt up high, as his pyro goes off, with the fans applauding both men for there tremendous efforts.


The Sam: If you ever wanted to know what a Pier 6 Brawl is, that match is your answer.

Amigo: I think a stray tooth from one of our competitors is right next to your hand, Sam. And now, our second match: Reigning champions The Pride going up against The Southwest Connection in a WWCF Tag Team title match. I know who you are rooting for, so let's go straight to it.


WWCF World Tag Team Championship: The Southwest Connection(LittleNaitch and Tyfo) V. The Pride(M.O.P. and Metylerca) [c]

Muffler – The following contest is set for 1 fall and it is for the WWCF Tag Team championships.
(SWC theme music plays)
Making their way to the ring, representing The Family, accompanied by their manager The Sam09. They are Tyfo and Littlenaitch, THE SOUTHWEST CONNECTION!
(SWC march their way down to the ring following The Sam.)
And their opponents.
(Pride theme plays)
At a total combined weight of 462 lbs. Representing The Pride. They are the WWCF Tag Team Champions, METYLERCA AND M.O.P
(Metylerca and M.O.P. make their way to ring acknowledging the fans along the way. They get in the ring and hand their titles over to the referee who holds the titles above his head)
Bell Rings
Littlenaitch and M.O.P. start off. Both competitors circle the ring a couple of times before going for a collared elbow tie up. M.O.P. Pushes Littlenaitch into the corner turnbuckle. The referee begins a 5 count. M.O.P. Lets go and stands back.
Once again, Naitch and M.O.P. circle the ring a few more times before once again going for another collared elbow tie up. This time Naitch pushes M.O.P. into the corner turnbuckle. The referee begins a 5 count. Naitch lets go at 4 and steps back. The fans approve with claps for both teams.
Naitch and M.O.P. circle the ring a couple of time before Naitch tags in Tyfo. Tyfo steps into the ring before charging towards M.O.P. with a Lariat. M.O.P. Ducks the Lariat and lays some Knife Edge Chops on Tyfo’s chest. This sends Tyfo rolling to the outside where he is met by The Sam and Naitch.
M.O.P. Tags in Metylerca who runs the ropes before going for a Suicide Plancha, which sends all 3 members of The Family to the ground along with Metylerca. The fans begin chanting “Holy S***”.
Metylerca manages to get to his feet and rolls in Tyfo before going for a 3 count.
1
2
Tyfo kicks out at 2.
Metylerca picks up Tyfo but Tyfo hits Metylerca with a massive forearm shot. Tyfo then Irish whips Metylerca and hits Metylerca with a Lariat. Tyfo goes for a pinfall.
1
2
2 count
Tyfo drags Metylerca over to the Family’s corner where Tyfo tags in Naitch who delivers a Knee Drop to Metylerca’s face. Naitch starts stomping away at Metylerca who picks himself up by the ropes. Naitch continues stomping away until Metylerca grabs Naitch’s boot. Naitch begins pleading and as he does so Tyfo runs across the apron and distracts Metylerca. M.O.P. Tries to enter the ring to save his partner but the referee tells him to get back. Meanwhile the Southwest Connection are beating up Metylerca who is completely helpless. Naitch then drags Metylerca to the centre of the ring, lets out a primal “WOOO!” before locking in a Figure 4 Leg Lock. Metylerca tries to drag himself towards the ropes but can’t quite reach it. Metylerca then uses his strength plus momentum to flip Naitch over to reverse the hold. Metylerca does so which forces Naitch to let go of the hold.
Both Naitch and Metylerca try to tag in their partners but Tyfo manages to get in the ring and attacks Metylerca. The referee sends him back to his corner but as he does so Metylerca tags in M.O.P however since the referee didn’t see the tag Metylerca is still the legal man. Tyfo then tags himself in and lifts up Metylerca.

The referee is trying to calm down M.O.P. but as he does so The Sam grabs a tag title. Metylerca kicks back Tyfo before heading off the ropes. As he does so Naitch grabs Metylerca in a double chicken wing as The Sam slides the Tag Title towards Tyfo. The referee is still distracted with M.O.P.
Tyfo reels up to hit a defenceless Metylerca with the tag title but as he does so Metylerca slips out of the chicken wing and Tyfo accidently wacks Naitch in the head with the title. Tyfo is shocked and Metylerca sneaks up behind Tyfo and delivers the “Ride the Lightnin’”, The crowd erupts as Metylerca goes for a pinfall.
1
2
3
Muffler – The winners of this match, and still WWCF Tag Team Champions. METYLERCA AND M.O.P THE PRIDE!
(The Pride celebrate in the ring as The Sam helps the SWC back into the locker room)

The Sam: *Returns to commentary* DID YOU SEE THAT? THEY CHEATED!

Amigo: I cheated all the time and no one ever complained........ Anyways, onto the main event, the Inter-Forum champion, Above Average, going up against Legion.

The Sam: Let me tell you something, this Above Average, for the past few months he has been on a roll. He has defended his title more than anyone else has defended a title in WWCF history, but in my opinion, that run is coming to an end tonight.
Legion is one bad mother, and I think Above Average is going to have a hard time overcoming the Dark One.

Amigo: Ah, but AA has beaten Legion before, so it could happen again. Now, let's see who wins.


WWCF Inter-Forum Championship: Legion V. Above Average [c]

Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is set for one fall, and it is for the WWCF Inter-Forum Championship!
Introducing first…
(Legion’s music begins playing)
From the darkness within you all, weighing in at 253 pounds, the challenger…(Everyone in the arena looks up, as Legion, wearing a giant pair of bat wings, descends to the ring via zipline)
LEGION!!!
(Legion releases himself from the zipline and raises his arms, causing black flames to shoot from the turnbuckles and the stage)

And his opponent…
(The Prodigy by Poison begins playing)
From Belfast, weighing in at 260 pounds…
(Above Average appears on stage and walks towards the ring, with pyro reigning down behind him)
The WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, ABOVE AVERAGE!!!

Above Average and Legion lockup in the center of the ring. Above Average arm drags Legion and applies an armbar. Legion fights out of it and whips Above Average into the ropes. Above Average comes off the ropes with a short tackle, cutting Legion off at the legs. Above Average rains punches down on Legion, until the referee pulls him off. As Above Average argues with the referee, Legion gets to his feet and surprises the Inter-Forum Champion with a blockbuster. Cover, 1-2-kick out. Legion pulls Above Average off the mat and delivers a shoulder breaker for another 2-count. As Above Average desperately tries to catch his breath, Legion removes one of the turnbuckle covers. Above Average is up and ready for Legion with a sit-out powerbomb, earning a 2-count. The Champion slams Legion to the mat and delivers a Garvin Stomp. Legion kicks out of the pin attempt. Above Average locks in a rear chinlock, but Legion is able to stand up with the Champion on his back. The challenger falls back, slamming Above Average to the mat. Legion makes a cover, but Above Average kicks out.

Legion works over Above Average’s neck, with hammer strikes and pressure points. Above Average tries to fight back, but Legion pokes the Champion in the eyes, and follows up with a DDT for a 2-count. Legion continues to punish his former partner, assaulting him with punches and shoulder strikes. He tosses Above Average into the corner(not the one with the exposed turnbuckle) and delivers a huge splash in the corner, followed by another near fall. Legion throws Above Average into the ropes and hit’s a backbody drop on the Champion. Legion follows up with an over-the-shoulder reverse piledriver, gaining another 2-count. Above Average struggles to his feet, only for Legion to knock him right back down again with a single punch. Legion then pulls Above Average to his feet and locks in the Arms of Morpheus. Above Average fights and struggles, desperately trying to break the hold, but Legion has it locked in right in the center of the ring. The referee checks on Above Average. He lifts the arm once, and it falls. Twice and it drops again. The third time, the arm doesn’t drop. Above Average breaks out of the hold and delivers a big running leg lariat, but only gets a 2-count.

Above Average pulls Legion up, but the challenger catches him off guard with a spinning neck breaker. Legion then signals that it’s time to finish this. Legion picks up the Champion on his shoulder and carries him over the exposed turnbuckle. As he goes for a stun gun, Above Average slides out and rams Legion into the corner. Dazed, Legion turns around and walks right into the Superkick. 1-2-3.

Here is your winner, and STILL WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, ABOVE AVERAGE!!!

As Legion returns to locker room, defeated, Above Average celebrates as the fans applaud.


Amigo: And there you have it, Above Average has proven who is the best.

The Sam: You have to wonder why a match of that caliber is not on the PPV.

Amigo: Because we have to give the viewers a taste of the best once in a while. And with that, our time is up. On behalf of everybody in the WWCF, I'm Dr. John S. Amigo, M.D.

The Sam: And I'm the "Manager of Champions" The Sam, reminding you to tune in tomorrow night for the WWCF PPV "Earnest Goes To Wargames" and tune in next week for more exciting WWCF action, right here on Sunday Night Heatz!