Sunday Night Heatz!!1
June 7, 2009
Welcome to Sunday Night Heatz!!1 I’m Gorilla Tim Hoss, and by side, like a shining light, Jesse King!
Gorilla, have we got a show for you tonight!
Right you are Jess. We have to opening round matches in Seth Drakin‘s Honor Invitational, and the Heatz!!1 Champion Viva Los Bio Dome in a non-title match against Legion!
Instead of talkin’ about it Gorilla, let’s just go to the action!
Boiler Room Brawler V. Relegate Hunter
Our opening match is Relegate Hunter versus the Boiler Room Brawler.
This match was announced last week after Niteraw, after Relegate Hunter pantsed The Sam.
That’s Mr The Sam to you Tim. And let me tell you something, I hope that Relegate has paid full on his insurance plan. Because once Boiler Room Brawler gets through with him, his Wife will become very rich.
You’re disgusting Jesse.
Lets head to our ring announcer, Michael Muffer.
The following contest is set for one fall. And I have just received word that this match will be contested under “No Holds Barred”.
What is this? No Holds Barred?
That’s right Tim, now these fans are going to see a great match.
Have you seen what BRB has done to competitors in the past? He has broken destroyed people under regulation rules, and now he is getting free range?
Well remember, Relegate Hunter is also competing under no rules.
Damn that The Sam, he just wants BRB to destroy Relegate Hunter.
Well that’s what happens when you don’t tow the line.
(The Killers- Smile Like You Mean It)
Making his way to the ring first. At the height of 5’10, weighing in at 190 lbs. From Brighton, England. This is RELEGAAAATE HUNTEEEEEER!!!
(Hunter runs to the ring high fiving the fans along the way)
Take a good look, because that may be the last time we see Relegate Hunter walking.
You may be right Jesse. This whole match stinks.
And his opponent;
(I'm So Bad (Baby I Don't Care) – Motörhead)
At the height of 6’0, weighing in at 350 lbs. From Rockford, Illinois. This is the BOILER ROOM BRAWWWWLEEEERRR!!!
*Boiler Room Brawler makes his way out of the Boiler Room carrying a steel pipe. The pyro goes off and BRB walks down the ramp
As BRB is about to climb over the top rope, RH hits a baseball slide on BRB sending him back to the floor. As BRB gets to his feet, RH grabs the top rope and slings himself over the top rope and hits a suicude dive on BRB. The bell sounds.
RH starts punching BRB while BRB is down. RH climbs up onto the apron and attempts to hit a standing lionsault. He jumps off the ropes but BRB slides out of the way as RH hits the concrete floor. BRB grabs RH y the head and lifts him up onto his feet before rolling RH into the ring.
As RH tries to recover from the botched Lionsault, BRB looks under the ring and pulls out a garbage can, a fire hydrant, a kendo stick and a stop sign before throwing these objects into the ring.
BRB climbs into the ring, RH is tryng to get to his feet when BRB hits him across the head with the stop sign. BRB then holds the stop sign as he runs off the ropes, as he comes back he uses the stop sign to drop a running elbow on RH. BRB goes for a pinfall.
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2
BRB raises RH’s arm to stop the pinfall.
BRB lifts up RH and puts one hand around RH’s throat. Before chokeslamming RH into the garbage can.
BRB starts taunting the crowd as they boo. RH rolls off the garbage can and grabs the fire hydrant. As BRB truns around, RH sprays the fire hydrant into BRB’s eyes. As BRB is temporarily blinded RH grabs the kendo stick and starts whacking BRB with it. BRB grabs the kendo stick and a tug of war begins between RH and BRB. RH lets go and BRB gets hit in the stomach with the kendo stick. RH uses this opportunity and grabs BRB’s head and manages to hit him with “Sliced Bread #2” into the trashcan.
Both men are exhausted and are down. Suddenly The Sam runs to ringside and grabs the steel pipe BRB dropped earlier.
Relegate Hunter manages to get to his feet first, he calls for his finisher “The Relegation”. As he jumps onto the 2nd rope The Sam swings back to hit him with steel pipe, Square grabs the pipe from The Sam. Relegate Hunter moonsaults back and but BRB rolls out of the way as RH lands on his feet.
The Sam and Square argue outside the ring as Boiler Room Brawler looks on. Boiler Room Brawler attempts to grab Square but Square hits BRB with the steel pipe sending BRB backwards, RH still standing behind BRB ducks down and school boys BRB for the pinfall.
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3
The winner of the match, RELEGATE HUNTER!
Relegate Hunter slides out of the ring and celebrates amongst the fans as The Sam slides into the ring to yell at the referee. As Relegate Hunter heads up the ramp Square stops him and says “Now, We’re Even”.
Square heads to the back as RH looks at him.
Well, interesting situation that appears to be developing between Relegate Hunter and Square.
But what is the connection between these two?
That question will have to be answered another day. Coming up next, Above Average V. Tyfo in the first round of Seth Drakin’s Tournament of Honor!
Tournament of Honor First Round Match: Tyfo V. Above Average
The following contest is a first round match in Seth Drakin’s Tournament of Honor, and it is to be contested under the Rules of Honor!
*New Blackjacks Theme*
Introducing first, from Dallas, Texas, weighing in at 245 pounds. Representing WWCF Corporate, Tyfo!
*The Prodigy - Poison*
And his opponent, from Belfast, Northern Ireland, weighing in at 260 pounds. Representing The Story, he is the WWCF Inter-Forum Champion, Above Average!
Tyfo and Above Average circle one another, before Tyfo throws a punch, which AA blocks, and comes back with a pump kick. AA slams Tyfo to the mat, and climbs to the middle turnbuckle. AA comes down with a forearm smash, but Tyfo get’s his foot up. AA catches it, though, and turns Tyfo over into a half crab. Tyfo crawls to the ropes, and firmly grasps the bottom rope, forcing a break. AA grabs Tyfo and tosses him into the corner. He charges in with a knee lift, but Tyfo moves, causing AA to knee the top turnbuckle. Tyfo rolls AA up.
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2
Kickout.
AA stands up, favoring his right knee. Tyfo zeros in on the knee, hitting a chop block, and then grapevining the leg. Tyfo punches the leg a few times, causing AA to scream in pain. The ref asks him if he wants to quit, but AA refuses. After struggling for almost a minute, AA powers out of the move, and catches Tyfo with a scoop slam. Cover.
1
Kickout.
As Tyfo rises, AA connects with a leg lariat!
1
2
Kickout!
AA lifts Tyfo for a suplex, but Tyfo blocks it, and lifts AA up, and drops him throat first across the top rope. As AA turns around, dazed, Tyfo nails the Tumbleweed. Cover.
1
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Here is your winner, Tyfo!
Tyfo celebrates his win, as the ref checks on Above Average. As Tyfo leaves, AA stands up to a standing ovation, but as he goes to leave, Doley jumps him from behind. He stomps AA a few times, before nailing the Dolinator. Doley grabs AA’s Inter-Forum belt, and holds it up, before dropping on AA’s chest and leaving.
Tyfo picks up the win, Jess, and advances in the tournament!
And after the match, Doley making a statement, at the expense of the Inter-Forum Champion.
Up next, Aaron Enigma V. The Headbanger Man in another Tournament of Honor match!
Tournament of Honor First Round Match: Aaron Enigma V. Headbanger Man
The following contest is a first round match in Seth Drakin’s Tournament of Honor, and is to be contested under the Rules of Honor!
*Wild Child*
Introducing first, from Kent, England, weighing in at 263 pounds, The Headbanger Man!
“Elementary, my dear Watson![/color]
*Know Your Enemy*
And his opponent, from Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at 256 pounds. Representing The Story, Aaron Enigma!
The match starts with Aaron walking to HeadbangerMan and offering his hand in respect. HeadbangerMan looks at him apprehensively at first but then reaches out and shakes Aaron's hand. However, he quickly follows with a kick to the midsection and a couple punches before irish whipping Aaron to the ropes. On the rebound Aaron ducks under a clothesline and quickly grabs HeadbangerMan by the head, delivering a vicious neckbreaker counter move. Aaron quickly bounces off the ropes and hits a leg drop on the downed Headbanger, covering him after.
1.....2.Headbanger kicks out!
Aaron picks up HeadbangerMan and goes for a suplex but Headbanger reverses it by kneeing Aaron in the gut. He quickly follows it with a DDT and goes for the pin.
1.....2...Aaron just barely kicks out!
HeadbangerMan locks an STF on Aaron in the middle of the ring. Aaron screams in pain as he makes his way to the ropes. After about 30 seconds Aaron is able to grab the bottom rope, forcing HeadbangerMan to break the hold. Headbanger breaks the hold and lifts Aaron up, throwing him into the corner and laying in a series of vicious lefts and rights to his head and chest. The ref pulls Headbanger off Aaron and Headbanger backs up a bit before charging at Aaron. He jumps to deliver a body splash but Aaron catches him. Running from the corner holding his opponent, Aaron delivers a vicious STO to HeadbangerMan. However, Aaron isn't done, and lifts HeadbangerMan, still stunned, back to his feet. Aaron start unleashing a series of kicks, first to the leg, then the a spinnng back kick to the chest followed by an enziguri then finally a reverse roundhouse, blasting HeadbangerMan to the mat. Aaron goes for another pin on Headbanger
1.....2....HeadbangerMan just gets his shoulder up.
Aaron looks increduously at the ref as HeadbangerMan slowly makes it to his feet. Headbanger sneaks up behind Aaron and grabs him by the waist. HeadbangerMan attempts to hit a German Suplex on Aaron but he flips through it. HeadbangerMan turns around to be hit with a reverse STO from Aaron. Aaron quickly locks in Extreme Interrogation on HeadbangerMan. He quickly taps out and Aaron releases the hold.
The winner of this match, Aaron Enigma!
*Aaron asks for mic and speaks*
I'm gonna make this quick. Sam, I said I would fight anyone you pick, I'll see them tomorrow. The vendetta will continue as planned. Watch you back Corporate, I don't play nice when I'm fighting for what I believe in.
And Aaron Enigma advances as well!
But he’s gonna have his hands full next week against Tyfo!
Up next, our main event, Legion V. The Heatz!!1 Champion, Viva Los Bio Dome!
Non-Title Main Event: Legion V. Viva Los Bio Dome
Viva enters the ring to "The Safety Dance", as usual, and requests a mic from the announcer before Legion comes out.
So yet again the powers that be have put me in a main event against someone who I've already beaten to a pulp. The lack of competition for me is sickening, dudes, and who's at fault? The Corporate Leader. D-Day Dave, you run this company like it's a JOKE. You've got one contender for me on cycle wash. How many times have I put that clown Koda through the ringer, man? At what point do you not just give up with this? Stop granting him matches. HE CAN'T TOUCH ME.
And now a match against Legion? I made an example out of him. I destroyed him. Enough said.
I'm putting you on notice, Mr. D-Day Dave.
*hands mic back to announcer*
Legion enters to Mordecai's theme with a scowl on his face as he enters the ring.
The referee rings the bell.
Viva and Legion lock up, and Legion whips him in to the corner and begins stomping him out as the crowd counts to 10 with him. Legion picks up Viva and delivers a couple of chops to the chest. Legion whips him off of the ropes and delivers a huge big boot. Viva rolls to the outside...
Viva's in trouble, Jess! Will he be able to overcome the odds?
I don't know, Gorilla! We'll find out after the break!
*Commercial break*
Hey, everyone! Quiznos is delicious. Remember that! Buy me, I'm a 4 dollar ciabatta, Scott!
*End break*
Welcome back to Sunday Night Heatz!!1 We're back to the main event tonight, Legion VS iViva Los Bio Dome!. Viva is in trouble, so lets get back to the action in the ring!
Viva rolls back into the ring and gouges Legions eyes. Viva nails him with a hard clothesline and a big knee drop. Viva picks Legion up, whips him into the corner, and nails him with a running flying knee. Viva climbs up to the top rope, goes for a frog splash, but Legion rolls out from under it.
Both men stand up and start trading blows. Viva gets the upper hand, does a stoner's dance, and goes for the Purple Sticky Punch!
Legion reverses it into the Arms of Morpheus! Viva beings to struggle but the pain is unbearable! iViva Los Bio Dome! taps to the pain!
Your winner.... Legion!!!!!!
Legion applies the lock for far too long after the bell. iViva Los Bio Dome! is screaming in agony. The security team as well as extra referees come in to break it up. Legion is seen with the same scowl he entered the ring with as Sunday Night Heatz!!1 comes to a close.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
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